Life — November 16, 1922 — page 31: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Some Coal Substitutes ESSIMISTIC fuel oil com- P panies are forecasting a coal shortage this winter. Even con- sidering the source of these gloomy predictions, there may nevertheless be a grain of probability in them. This country learned during the war that when there ¢s a shortage you can fuel all the people some of the time, and you can fuel some of the more influential people all the time, but you can’t fuel all the people all the time. So in case it does become necessary to con- sider substitutes for coal, a few things that might be burned to ad- vant. are here enumerated: (1) Colonial furniture. (2) Cytherea. It is not neces- sary to ignite this book—in fact, a bucket of water should be dashed over it occasionally to prevent spon- taneous combustion. Simply place a copy in the furnace and the house will be kept warm all winter. (3) Art lamp shades. (4) The Congressional Record. (5) The Hearst papers. (6) Strike leaders. (7) Coal dealers. (8) Interior decorators. (9) Vaudeville actors. Other substitutes will doubtless suggest themselves to the reader. Those given here, however, should suffice to tide things over until Spring. A minute saved isa minute gained WHO HAVE MISSED SHOE LACING HOOKS 8 LACING HOOKS CAN BE OBTAINED ON EX- CLUSIVE MODELS OF QUALITY FOOTWEAR. INSIST ON HAVING WHAT YOU WANT. FOR _g MEN OF BRAINS IGARS “MADE AT KEY WEST— The Dollar The daily actions of most of us are influenced by the mes- sages received over the tele- phone, and yet few of us stop to think of the men and women, and the mechanisms, which help to make that daily service possible. Maintenance, repairs, and the work of handling calls, must constantly be carried on in good times or in bad, and they must be paid for, in order that your telephone service may be continued. The average dollar will buy to-day less than two-thirds of what it would buy before the war. This means that it costs, on the average, half as much again to buy most of the things that are necessary for keeping the country going; but the ad- vance in telephone rates is far less than this average. In fact, gauged by the pres- ent purchasing power of the dollar, telephone service in the country as a whole is costing the subscriber less than it did in 1914. The Bell System generally has been able to meet higher commodity prices and in- creased wages by means of new economies in operation and the increased efficiency of loyal employees. Poa “BELL SYSTEM" La ‘\ AMERICAN TELEPHONE AND TELEGRAPH COMPANY ON AND ASSOCIATED COMPANIES One Policy, One System, Universal Service, and all directed toward Ron Better Service The Perfect Companion He never offers to explain the sit- uation in the Near East but will listen patiently while you try to; he doesn’t tell you his golf scores or what he likes for breakfast; he has been abroad but he has no opinion on the war debts; he has seven inter- esting children but never repeats the bright things they say; and never, under any circumstances, has he been known to try to tell you the plot of a motion picture. M..H. skin can be quickly cleared of ples, Blackheads, face or body—! "ores, Oily or Shiny Skin, CiLEAR-ToNE Tried, Tested and Proven its merits in over 100,000 test cases. WRITE TODAY for my FreeBooklet—"A CLEAR- ‘Tone Skin"’—telling how I cured myself after being afflicted fifteen years, E. S. GIVENS, 226 Chemical Bidy., Kensas City,Me. comicbooks.com