Life — October 19, 1922 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PTCHE Drys claim the bootleggers tamper with Justice. Maybe that’s why Justice is blind. General Pershing has now started work on jis memoirs. Let’s see—that disposes of every- one with the exception of Grover Cleveland Bergdoll. Hereafter the provident man will buy coal in the months when he shouldn’t eat oysters. No celebrity in the world is safe with When Prohibition agents ask a bar- Clare Sheridan twenty miles away. aL With the profiteers getting only fifteen cents a ton more for coal than last year, there has evidently been a rift in the loot. JL If all the boarding-house dwellers in Greater New York were placed end to end, they would reach. AL The trouble with the Repub- lican and Democratic parties is that one isn’t republican and the other isn’t demo- cratic. LL The press dispatches of the recent championship fight in France should have stated: Veni, Vidi, Siki. aL Carpentier was described as “A Young Greek God,” and now Siki is called “The Black Panther.” Jack +Dempse: title, however, is still “Heavy- weight Champion of the World.” aL After they drive the Turks out of the Near East, will the diplomats kindly push war out of the Near Future? —L A 96-year-old physician smokes sixty cigarettes a day. His longevity, no doubt, is due to the fact that he walked a mile for each one. The vessels in the dry navy don’t seem to be very reliable cup defenders. Getting five dollars a word for his memoirs should en- courage Lloyd George to in- sert a stuttering character into his work. Henry Cabot Lodge. Senator, to call you less would be Lése majesté , Once more your star victorious we see Resume its way, Once more on your revered patrician head The wreath is thrown. Some constellations on their paths are led; You roll your own. The Sacred Cod-fish thrills with joy divine Your course to see, Uninfluenced, along the dotted line Marked G. O. P. And all Stand-patters pray that should there come A time of stress, They'll find a Henry Cabot Lodge in some Vast wilderness. G.C. tender what he’s got to drink, a soft answer turneth away suspicion, aL So far Will Hays’ dictator- ship has consisted in dictating speeches. IL Now let’s have the film com- pany that insured Pola Negri against getting married in- sure the rest of its stars against getting divorced. The New York fans have been in a delicate position during the World’s Series. They don’t know which team to throw their empty pop bot- tles at. LL The politician who promises a Business Administration generally gives a Tired Busi- ness Administration. aL Ireland’s food Dill comes high. There is doubtless an additional charge for Cork- age. LL The report that an Atlantic City hotel overcharged a diner is denied. It was only a roomer. JL Losing Congressmen in the November elections will be an advantage for the Repub- lican party if it only loses the right ones. +L The U. S. Shipping Board denies there is any falling off of transatlantic passengers. Except, of course, falling off the water wagon. The Irish government now wants to join the League of Nations. Those boys just can’t seem to keep out of hot water. comicbooks.com