Life — June 8, 1922 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

OMETHING might yet be done about Prohibition. It’s never too late to amend. aL Judging from most of the flappers we've met, a better name for them would be The Dummy Virgins. These are the days when the spirits of the dead have become the For his faculty of getting in and out of holes quickly, Lloyd George might be called a Welsh rabbit. aL Man's upward march continues. To-day his invention of the radiophone ena- bles thousands to sit quietly in their own homes and listen to a girl in Newark singing “Yoohoo.” The Eskimo Pie, judging from those we've eaten, derives its name from the fact that the chief article of diet «mong the Eskimos is soap. a Now that they’ve invented butionless underwear, maybe someone will us a political campaign withou tons, too. give but- aL very life of the party. aL What this country needs most is that Peggy Hop- kins be barred from roto- gravure sections. aL Lincoln split logs; the modern statesman merely rolls ‘em. aL June, July, August and September are the months when mosquitoes present their bills. A telegram in Russia costs 50,000 rubles a word. But look at some of the words you can send. Bootleggers refuse to join the Light Wine and Beer Union urged by Gompers. They prefer Volstead’s Open Shop. aL The 1922 evening gown has no hooks and all eyes are on the back. —L Moving picture production is at a standstill, and coal isn’t being screened, either. aL Henry Ford may hold the OFFICE Life: Johnny Walker: | Hello, Johnny Walker, glad to see you. shop. I thought it was Punch! JL 2—— They keep building larger Weilall feel gay | When Johnny comes marching home | Bless my soul. I’ve come to the wrong Lenine and Trotzky to produce a revival this summer by the Soviet Stock Company of “A Loan at Last.” hope and more magni \ ocean liners, but the word in steamships is “All ashore that’s ashore.” icent last still, going aL The movie magnates are trying to prove that Holly- wood isn’t as red as it's painted. aL Fifty million dollars in counterfeit Liberty bonds can never disturb a coun- try where they’re counter- feiting $50,000,000,000 worth of Gordon gin labels. JL When anyone wants to lure the public into risky stock deals, he first of all fits up offices with costly furniture and __ panelling. To create popular confi- dence there’s nothing like the Old Oaken Bucket- shop. Detroit record for speed in turning out junk, but Edgar Guest is snapping right at his heels. aL One might infer from the report of the Court of Domestic Relations that there aren’t any. aL “World’s Supply of Ivory Is Becoming Exhausted,” says a headline. Brain fag? No matter how many additional mem- bers Congress has, there will always be plenty of room for improvement. dL Hereafter, when desiring to engage an- other nation in combat, a country will be required to serve formal notice three times. This, presumably, is what is known as civil war. By special arrangement with the Anti-Saloon League, Americans sailing for Europe this summer will be permitted to check their allegiance at the three-mile limit. aL The House of Representatives doesn't know how it will manage to raise cash to pay the bonus if the bill passes the Senate. In other words, the House is pinched. comicbooks.com