Life — December 8, 1921 — page 8: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

‘HE trial of M. Landru, “the French Bluebeard,” discloses the fact that he has had 283 fiancées. He must be one of those boys you see around summer resorts. The coal men cannot fuel all the peo- ple all the time. : aL The Christmas spirit as It would seem as though the Senatorial “Damps” and “Drys” were still at lagerheads over the beer bill. aL Hylan was re-elected on a platform of five-cent fares. Practically any subway platform in New York con- tains enough voters to swing an elec- A lot of risqué farces would never score if it weren’t for excellent police interference. aL Government officials declare that the next war will be fought in the air and under water. On the level? JL A recent movie feature some people understand it seems to be “hollier than thou.” JL Cider must be hard to sell. aL In a royal tomb in The- bes, a box containing a pack of gold-washed playing cards was dis- covered. Evidently an expensive Pharaoh lay-out. aL The great vogue of wool stockings for flappers means a sacrifice of the lambs for the limbs. aL Japan may be the world’s Pacific problem, but Ire- land is its non-pacific problem. dL was dedicated “to all women who don't realize the value of money.” Why not, “to all women —period”? Jack Dempsey has gone on the stage, which proves the sock and bus- kin are still inseparable. aL The wife of a succes ful humorist always has plenty of pun-moncy. JL It is rumored that Judge Landis, the Bascball Commissioner, intends to relegate Babe Ruth to bench duty next season for insubordination. All of which would seem to justify the prevalent sus- picion that Hizzoner places the bench in sub- Some of the geniuses in Greenwich Village may be genuine, but most of them seem to be freudu- lent. JL Striking waiters invade restaurants, breaking dishes and pouring soup on the diners—Berlin UL For Christmas Day the Christmas dough Is kneaded high and kneaded low. Punch it thick and thump it thin, Flatten it out with a rolling-pin. In the kitchen’s lots of fun When Christmas pie and Christmas bun Are kneaded high and kneaded low For lovely, squodgy Christmas dough. ordination to baseball. There are only a few original jokes and most of them are in Congress. JL If somebody only had some brass tacks the country could start get- ting down to them. News Item. Returning to work, we suppose. aL Those two New York Socialists who have learned on a recount that they were elected aldermen in 1919 must feel that they were just marxing time. IL blind Detroit bank cashier rob bank.—News Bandits with pepper and Item. When a teller needs a friend. Lloyd George says that good politicians are scarce. Scarce? They’re impossible. LL Now that rompers for children are go- ing out, their union suits will probably be called “gompers.” LL The most useless gift one can give his wife at this time is a charge account, not to be opened till Christmas. JIL Dr. Sze, of China, has asked the Arms Conference to end the Boxer payments. A formal protest is expected from Mr. Dempsey. LL This is the last week of the Life Line Contest. Contributions received in this office after December rsth will not be eligible for the $100 prize, although they will be considered as possible Life Lines, and, if accepted, will be paid for at the usual rate of $5 apiece. comicbooks.com