Life — March 31, 1921 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

a sillrants Tragedian: YES, 1 PLAYED OTHELLO LAST SEASON, HUNDRED DOLLARS A WEEK, Comedian; WHAT DID YOU DO THE OTHER FIFTY-ONE WEEKS? No Cause for Complaint A STRANDED but still haughty actor who was obliged to put up at a dilapidated country hotel, remarked, as he glanced frowningly about the office, reluctantly signed the register, and took the brass key from the proprietor, “Is there any water in my room?” “There was,” replicd the proprietor, “but I had the roof repaired.” oT TWO Practical rubbish—no fine sentimentality—if you | DON'T want any please,” said the widow, who was asked what kind of an epitaph she desired for her late husband. simple, something like this: “William Johnston, aged seventy-five years: the good dic young.” “Let it be short and LIFeR The Language of the Spirits HERE do all the new words come from? them? How are they made? Where is the ve Who is the scientist in charge of the noun-laboratory? Are these run on the eight-hour system, and do the word-makers get time-and-a-half for overtime? Are there slack seasons? Does the seasonable demand sometimes overwhelm them so that they can’t even fill their rush orders? These are imperative questions, and we pause for a reply. In the meanwhile we note that the production of linguistic novelties has been greatly stimulated by the Volstead act. The passage of that law has created a demand for a heter y of new words, and the manufacturers have met this inquiry with an enlarged output of strange locutions, some of them as fantastic as the fashions of the female of the species. Booze, an unlovely vocable but not inexpressive, is an old friend; but hooch—how came that monosyllable into being? Had it a father or was it born by spontaneous generation? Moonshine whisky was known not long ago only to the Appalachian moun- taineers; and now this adjective is used from Portland, Maine, to Portland, Oregon. The same good fortune has befallen other localisms, blind pig and speak easy and bootlegger. Only in a section where men still wear high boots could bootlegger have created itself. And rumhound—there’s another vigorous term; who is responsible for that? On the other hand, the origin of home-brew is obvious enough. What is really comic is that our kin across the sea, having repelled the ministrations of Mr. P. Johnson, have jumped to the conclusion that pussyfoot is equivalent to Prohibitionist So it is that in the British Isles every advocate of the abolition of the liquor traffic is called a pussyfooter. no matter how bold and blatant he may be. It is always a sad and sorry spectacle when the British monkey with the American language. They mean well, but they never realize that it is loaded—and loaded for bear. As a result, accidents are always happening. Still, they mean well; and in time they may learn that the American language is not a toy for the innocent to play with. B.M. Actuality “WES, sir! I've always said there was one thing I wouldn't have—a skeleton in my closet.” “Where do you keep him—on the front piazza?” THE HOUSING PROBLEM IN TOADLAND! Landlord: No CHILDREN TAKEN IN THIS APARTMENT. NUTHIN’ DOIN’, MA’AM! comicbooks.com