Life — December 2, 1920 — page 68: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

‘CHRISTMAS LIFE - A Brass-Mounted Heaven An epitaph in San Diego, Cal, as reported in the Times of Cuba “This yere is sakrid to the memory of William Henry Skaraken, who was shot by Colt’s revolver—one of the old kind brass mounted, and of sich is the kingdom of heaven.” The Strike Fever Scuootmaster (as school reopens): Here, my young friend, why aren't you returning to school ? Lanorer’s Son (doggedly): I want three dollars a day and a four-hour school. —Le Journal Amusant (Paris). Let There Be Lights The Astronomical Correspondent of The Times suggests that the new star may have been produced through a sun being struck by a comet. This raises the question as to whether suns ought not to carry rear lights. —Punch, Jimmy: ster over mere WILL va, NELLIE? Mart Towne I once knew a man named Mart Towne, who was wasting away with illness. Mee. ing him one day, I suggested a remedy, “IT can't try your suggestion for some time,” he replied in a weak voice, “so many others are in ahead of you.” The man died before he got round to my remedy. Here was a man who had had good advice for years, yet he grew thinner stead ly, and finally died with a great stock of good advice on hand he had been unable ts try. — From “The Anthology of Another Tun,” by E. W. Howe (Knopf) Happy Hunting Ground Sign on a Western farm: “Hunter Take Notice: Hunt all you durn please and when you hear the horn blow come te the house for dinner. If the quail are scarce, kill a chicken or two, and if you can't ge any squirrels, kill a hog.” —San Francisco Chronicle. Final Consideration Juvce: Five years’ penal servitude. Prisoner (to friend in the gallery): Ga in an’ tell the missus I sha’n't be ‘ome te supper, Bill !—Tit-Bits. Lire is published every Thursday, simultaneously in the United States, Great Britain, $5.00 a year in advance. Additional postage to foreign countries in the Postal Union, $1.60 a year; Back numbers, after three months Canada and British Possessions. Title registered in U. S, Patent Office. to Canada, 80 cents, Single current copies, 15 cents. from date of publication, 25 cents. Issues prior to 1910 out of print. The text and illustrations in Lire are copyrighted. For Reprint Rights in Great Britain epply to Lire, Rolls House, Breams Buildings, Fetter Lane, London, E. C., England, envelope. The foreign trade supplied from Lire’s London Office, Rolls House, Breams ings, London, E. C. Montreal, Canada. contri Canadian distributor, J. R. Tanguay, 386-388 St, James S tions will be returmed unless accompanied by stamped and eddra Live does not hold itself responsible for the loss or non-return of licited contributions. Notice of change of address should reach this office two weeks prior to the de issue to be affected. Never gets on your nerves ‘The right smoke for health and pleasure, tg Antonio Roig and sdorf, makers Philadelphia Established 49 Years There's a size to fit every occasion. Try the “Educator” size. A grand after-dinner smoke. Gee! f WONDER HOW MANY PAIRS OF THEM SANTY CLAUS LETS HIM HANG UP?” XUM comicbooks.com