Life, 1920-11-04 · page 15 of 60
Life — November 4, 1920 — page 15: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains a poem by George S. Chappell addressed to fellow collectors of antiques and curiosities. The poem humorously catalogs the speaker's accumulated possessions—Windsor chairs, prints, samplers, a comb-backed chair—while confessing anxiety about their authenticity and value. The accompanying illustration shows a domestic scene where a man displays his collected items to visitors. The satire targets wealthy collectors' obsession with acquiring "antique" goods, often uncertain whether purchases are genuine. The poem's confession that he "only think[s] of shoes" now and questions whether items are "worse than warts" mocks the pretentiousness and buyer's remorse common among collectors. Below is an unrelated joke about a prospective father-in-law questioning a young man's occupation.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
The Collector, to His Collectors LOOK about my house and sce, In living-room and hall, The fruits of many a buying spree And many a fiscal fall— My clipper ship and early prints, My maple highboy, faded chintz And samplers, with other lovely tints— Extravagances all! O comb-backed Windsor, with what joy I brought you down the road, That day I met the baker's boy And hid behind my load! And you, my old black tea set, too! I wondered, as I purchased you, If Mr. Kirk, the coalman, knew Of such a thing as spode. And so with all that I acquire; My guilt I cannot lose, But have, like ancient Staffordshire, Those antiquarian blues. That oval platter bears, I vow, My butcher’s likeness—God knows how— And when I see a spade-foot, now, I only think of shoes! Surely I ought to blush with shame To be by tradesmen cursed, And thus to have my honored name Marked down as worse than worst! I'll pay them, one and all, I swear, Including Bowles, the antiquaire, From whom, last week, I bought that chair— In fact, I'll pay him first! George S. Chappell. ROSPECTIVE FATHER-IN-LAW: What is your occupation, young man? Prospective Son-tn-LAw: I pursue the literary profession. “Have you ever succeeded in catching up with it?” FATHER IS GOING TO BUY A NEW MOTOR CAR—HE DOESN'T REALIZE IT YET comicbooks.com