Life — July 29, 1920 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“LIFE: After-Bedtime Stories How Lillian Mosquito Projects Her Voice LL the children came crowding around Mother Nature one cold, raw afternoon in summer, crying in unison: : “Oh, Mother Nature, you promised us that you would tell us how Mosquito projects her voice! You promised that you would tell us how Lillian Mosquito projects her voice!” “So I did! So I did!” said Mother Nature, la: ing down an oak, the leaves of which she was tipping with scarlet for the fall trade. “And so I will! So I will!” At which Waldo Lizard, Edna Elephant and Lawrence Walrus jumped with imi- tation joy, for they had hoped to have an afternoon off. e Mother Nature led them across the fields to the piazza of a clubhouse on which there was an exposed ankle belong- ing to one of the members. she had expected, they found Lillian Mos- quito having tea. “ Lillian,” called Mother Nature, “ come off a minute. 1 have some little friends here who would like to know it is that you manage to hum in such a manner Lillian There, as how :E-FER-ALL EB STEBBI'S SORR! HAYSEED BLOWED OUT OF HI MEDDERS’ WHISKERS EB COULDN'T as to give the impression of being just outside the ear of a person in bed, when actually you are across the room.” “Will you kindly said Lillian, flying over to the railing “We want to know,” Mother Nature, “how it is that very often, when you have been fairly caught, it turns out that you have escaped without injury.” “T would prefer to answer the ques- tion as it was first put,” said Lillian So Waldo Lizard, Edna Elephan Lawrence Walrus, seeing that there was way out, cried “Yes, yes, Lillian, do tell us.” “First of all, you must know,” Lillian Mosquito, “that my chief duty is to . Whatever else I do, however many bites I total in the course of the I do not consider that I “made good’ unless I have caused a great deal of annoyance while doing it. A bite, quietly executed and not discovered by the victim until morning, does me no good. It is my duty play with him before biting epeat the question?” said began evening, have nd my pleasure, to as you have often heard a cat plays with a mouse, tormenting him with and maki him struggle to defend himself, . + If I am using too long words for you, please stop me.” apprehension “Stop!” cried Waldo Lizard, reaching for his hat, with the idea of possibly AT THE COUNTY FAIR HI, SO EB HE COME IN SECOND getting to the ball fifth inning. But he was prevented from leaving by kindly old Mother Nature, who stepped on him with her kindly old heel, and park by the Lillian Mosquito continued be able to voice with great skill of “T must therefore, you see, use my little course, the first thing to do is to make my victim think th than I really am. I am nearer to him To do this, I sit quite still, let us say, on the footboard of the bed, and, beginning to hum in’a very, very low tone of volume and voice, increase the raise the pitch gradually, thereby giving the effect of approaching the pillow. “The man in bed thinks that he hears me coming toward his head, a I often see him, teeth until he can v clenched that I ar Sometimes I waiting thinks enough to swat strike quick little g above him ai ace-note, as if I were rig! 1 about to make a landin It is great fun at such tin suddenly strike himself over the ear (they always think that I at their ear), and then feel carefully between his finger Then, too, there is always the pleasure of think- s to see him am right tips to see if he has caught me. ing that perhaps he has hurt himself quite badly by the blow. I have often known victims of mine to deafen themselves per- |. WOULD HEV GUT IT, BUT SO MUCH OATS AND T THE HORSE TO QUIT A-FOLLERIN’ comicbooks.com