Life, 1920-03-25 · page 28 of 40
Life — March 25, 1920 — page 28: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This four-act comedy mocks the stereotype of the passionate Latin lover through exaggerated violence and cultural contrasts. Féodor, a Spanish lothario, claims to be Europe's greatest lover—yet his "courtship" consists entirely of physical brutality: he bangs Pepita's head, "jabs" with his right hand during a fight with Carmen, and describes romance as boxing matches. The satire escalates when Féodor reaches America. Mary reciprocates his "passionate" declarations by smashing furniture over his head with a hammer, and her husband chases him out a window—yet Féodor still declares himself "champion of the world." The final scene shows him courting an Ulgfsz (likely a Balkan woman), who responds to his declarations by hurling a mammoth rock at him. The joke: Féodor never recognizes that his victims aren't actually responding to romance—they're retaliating with violence. The satire targets both exaggerated "continental lover" mythology and suggests that aggressive domination masquerades as passion.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
564 “ERR E The Champion Lover A Four-Round Drama of Punch, Passion and Pathos By V. Bl—sc— y lb—i—z (Round One: Andalusia—Féodor and Pepita.) EPITA: Kees me, kees me, my Féodor. Oh, kees me! Féovor: Kees you? No, Pepita, I loave you too much. (He seizes her by the neck, and bangs her severely several times on the nose.) Perrra: -Beautiful brute, I adore you. I faint weeth joy. (She' faints.) Féovor: Ha! She has fainted. I am the champion lover of Andalusia. (Round Two: Seville—Féodor and Spanish citizens.) Fmst Crt.: It is true, then, that Féodor claims to be the champion lover of Spain? Seconp Crt.: Quite. His path is strewn with broken hearts and bruised nos Even now he is paying suit to Carmen, our national cinema vam- pire. But hush!—here he comes. (Enter dor.) Greetings, Don Féodor! What luck? Féopox: It was grand, It was marvelous, I jabbed with my right. She countered. A feint with my left—an opening—a right uppercut, and... that was all She took the count. (Modestly) Tt was nothing. First Cit.: Magnificent! You are truly champion of Féopor: France, Italy, England, China, Sweden, Ger- pain. many—everywhere—I have swept them all before me. 1 Seconp Cit.; Bravo! am the recognized champion lover of Europe. But you— (Round Three: America—Féodor and Mary.) you—I loave you as I have never loaved before. Beautiful —precious—incomparable—I loave you. Do you under- stand? I—loave—you. I—loave—you. (He punctuates his declaration with heavy, Prussian-like kicks.) Mary (shyly): And I—I am deeply impressed. 1 icel the poignancy of your words. I—I—I reciprocate, (She splinters a heavy mission armchair over his head.) Féopor: Ah, these divine American temperament! These ardor! . . . these passion! Queridissima . . Mary (shricks): Have a care—my husband! (Collapses. Féovor: Carramba! You did not tell me that you had a husband—an American husband! Diantre! 1 go at ence but IT win on a foul. (lle hastily jumps out of | window. From below) Remember—I am now champion of the world! (Round Four: A Place in the Balkans—Féodor, Ulgfs: Féopor: For thirteen yeans I have been the undisp World's Champion Lover. I must confess that the few years have been a little lonely. Ladies are just a bit too eager to concede my championship without fair trial. In the interests of true sport, it is disheartening. I last I have found Ulgfsz, Queen of the Balkans. Sie, I think, is worthy of my prowess. To pronounce her name is in itself a mighty effort. (Enter Ulgfsz froma distance.) Utcrsz: Ah, there, my little Féodor! (She breaks off a large bit of a mammoth rock and play; vs it at RETURNING SPIRITS him). f mmoth rock and playfully throws it a! PSYCHIC PHENOMENA 'Departing Cook: wome, yames! (Continued on page 573) comicbooks.com