Life, 1920-03-04 · page 32 of 78
Life — March 4, 1920 — page 32: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three satirical pieces from an early 20th-century American humor magazine: **"A Congressman Proposes"**: A poem mocking a self-important politician who frames a marriage proposal as a patriotic duty to the nation, needing a wife to praise him and support his political schemes. The satire targets politicians' inflated self-regard. **"Forced Inheritance"**: A anecdote about a Scottish soldier in WWI (Battle of Passchendaele) who repeatedly asks a German prisoner for his watch. When the prisoner refuses, the soldier simply takes it by force—then euphemistically calls it "inheritance." The dark humor satirizes wartime brutality disguised by wordplay. **"The White Man's Burden"**: Two milkmen discuss eagerly awaiting the next government investigation to justify raising milk prices, suggesting collusion. A separate cartoon shows bears complaining they forgot to tell their milkman to stop deliveries before hibernation. Together, these mock both price-fixing schemes and absurd bureaucratic consequences. The page satirizes politicians, wartime conduct, and economic manipulation typical of Life's critical stance on American society.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
416 Al Congressman Proposes AIR Imogene, | feign would speak. In tones of bold aggression, Upon a favor which I seck In this, our present session ; T'll need two minutes—searcely more Mav |. wy darling, have the floor? {t's just like this: aman of my Importance to this nation, Needs someone standing closely by, With words of approbation : A wife, who'll pat him on the back. And tell him he’s a crackerjack! Oh, Imogene, ‘tis sad indeed, When I, a politician, Must grope around for words to plead My scheme for coalition; But, since the scheme T must impart. T seek a mandate—on—your heart! And though the world at large admit- That you're a stunning beauty You ought to marry me, for it’s Your patriotic duty! And so, with fervor unconcealed, I whisper, darling, won't you—yield ? Oliver B. Capelte Forced Inheritance URING the battle of Paschendaele a seriously wounded Gordon High- lander was brought into one of the Canadian dressing stations. The sur- geon noticed he was wearing a fine gold wrist watch, “Where did you get that, Scotty?” he asked. Scotty merely smiled at the time, but, on being told that the chances were against him, he later confided the story to the doctor. “T took a Heine prisoner who was wearin’ yon watch. ‘Wull ye gie me it?’ I eskit him. He shookit his heed. I eskit him the second time. He shook- it his heed again. ‘For the third and last time, as a gentlemaun,’ I sez, ‘ will ye gie me thot watch?’ Heine shookit his heed.” “ But you got it?” : “Weel, efter thot I simply inherited it.” The White Man’s Burden IRST MILKMAN: I declare! We'll have to raise the price of milk again soon. Seconp MILKMAN: Sure will! I can hardly wait till the next official investigation. Old Mr. Bear: LAND SAKES, HEPSY, WE'RE RUINED! HERE WE WENT TO BED LAST FALL AND FORGOT TO TELL THE MILKMAN TO STOP LEAVING OUR MORNING SUPPLY OF MILK comicbooks.com