Life — October 30, 1919 — page 23: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Co Our Friends IFE has been temporarily af- flicted by the printers’ strike. For the time being we have had to abandon our colored cov- ers. There have been other curtailments and displacements. Although our issues have been delayed, we are gradually catch- ing up, and the continuity of Lire’s appearance remains un- broken. To the many friends among our readers and advertisers, who have volunteered their loyalty and sympathy, we renew the assurances of our distinguished consideration. Some Open Letters Hon. League of Nations, Care Col. E. M. House, Washington, D. C. EAR LEAGUE: How are you feeling these days? I heard you weren't very well, so I thought I’d drop you a line from this end, as it may cheer you up to know how our folks are. This morning our prize hen laid an egg, which will have to last us another week. I hope to have a new suit next year. The shingles fell off the house this morning. We expect to build a fire Christmas, if we can bor- tow enough coal from the gentleman profiteer who lives next door. Our milkman didn’t come today; he said it would be coupon day with him. We are buying the baby’s coffin on the instalment plan. Not having any business to attend to on account of strikes, we are having a fine time dis- posing of our belongings to our former help. They all send love. Well, old fellow, keep yourself alive, even if the rest of us are welcoming death in almost any form. Cordially and starvingly yours, Lire. To the Public DEAR PUBLIC: Has it ever oc- curred to you that you have a perfectly good country on your hands, and don't know what to do with it? . There are still quite a few of its natural “KNOWLEDGE IS POWER” resources left, in spite of the efforts of the politicians and the profiteers to destroy them; there is some wheat, some corn and cotton, some pockets of coal, a few trees and—in spite of Burleson—a railroad or two. Why noi organize and pull out a plum or so for yourself? Everybody else has. And you've been a fairly good little boy. You've had your pants torn off you and your marbles taken away, and been fed on adulterated foods, and generally beaten up; and you haven't peeped. And you're some boy, if you would only organize. Awaiting your reply, I am, Expectantly yours, Lire To Meaico. EAR MEXICO: I wish I could do something to help you in your attempt to get into the limelight. Every once in a while you rise up in bed and try to make a noise like a man advertising himself—but you have never really learned how. You might come on and take a few lessons from Senator Hiram Johnson. Better stil" won't you be subjugated? Let us become your patron saint. Let us, with the loving thought that we are doing this only for your sake, plaster upcn you a few of the wonderful things that give us the opportunity for limelight gossip—nut and Billy Sun- days, the multifarious antis, woman suffrage, picturesque journalism, con- gressional verbosity, profiteering, Los Angeles art and literary persiflage. Please, Mexico, be subjugated. We need a new subject for profound draw- ing-room and smoking-bar specula- tion Restlessly yours, Lire. From Suffragette to Kitchenette Butts: Do you notice any difference in your wife since she finished her work with the suffragettes? Gitts: Difference? Can't say that I do, old man. She used to stay out all day to prove she was man’s equal, and now she stays home all of the time to prove that having the ballot has not robbed her of her feminine in- stincts. comicbooks.com