Life, 1919-02-13 · page 13 of 42
Life — February 13, 1919 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two satirical pieces from the post-WWI era: **"The Biograph"** (top left) is a poem by Arthur Guiterman mocking Colonel E.M. House, described as a "gray and silent Super-mouse" involved in diplomatic negotiations. It satirizes his role in peace negotiations, inventing phrases like "Freedom of the Seas." **The illustration** shows a well-dressed woman in a luxurious coat speaking to a child, captioned: "Oh, Mamma! How can that animal afford a coat like yours?" This is ironic social commentary on wealth inequality and conspicuous consumption. **"Chafing"** (bottom) discusses post-war delays in peace negotiations, suggesting American delegates are "chafing"—growing impatient—while peace talks drag on. It criticizes the slow diplomatic process preventing soldiers' return home.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
The Biograph EDWARD MANDELL HOUSE ye FE. wizard Colonel, E. M. House, That gray and silent Super-mouse, For shrewd Diplomacy is truly » greatest Man since Mr. Dooley. Omar's lyric Saying goes fe knows about it all, HE knows.” d what he knows, or deems Essen- tial, mystic Councils Presidential necromantic Robes arrayed, te tells !—and History is made Our Merlin, Texas-born and bred, Poretold the War, oh, Months ahead, \nd warned the Potentates to drop it. «i don’t know why he didn’t stop it.) ‘This Pearl of future LL.Ds, vented “Freedom of the Seas,” \nd soon will clear away the Hazes Involving that and other Phrases. He seeks no Cheers from fickle Throats, Nor (for himself) desires Votes For any Post—the Lord’s Anointed Don’t need such Things; th pointed. Arthur G: Advice to a Prospective Pedestrian O not get off a car back- ward. Learn to jump on top of the nearest Ford and roll off onto the sidewalk. When you are run over, look pleas- ant. Nothing disturbs a driver more than to have the people he runs over look cross at him. In case of your death, notify your Nobody else will have time. Display your number conspicuously. Your wife will thus be able to identify ou the more easily in the common pedestrian graveyard provided by the ity Remember that you are giving your life, not to your country, but to your ity, The city expects it, and would ¢ disappointed if you didn't W-bye! sl Well, 1 see that we are going “to get our divorce. What a relief! occasionally Now we ca ce each other without any sense of responsibility wee Meant “OW, MAMMA! HOW CAN THAT ANIMAL AFFORD A COAT LIKE YouRS?” Chafing I' chafing will do the trick, then the end of the real end of the war ought soon to be within sight, The fighting men in all the armies now lined up at parade rest along the Rhine are reported to be because they would rather be than standing around and en joying the scenery in somebody else's fatherland. And the legates are reported to be chafing be American peace cause things on the other side are not happening fast enough to suit them ig alto The peace business is progre Everybody would like to see it speeded up, American All this delay chafes us gether too slowly. fashion. Perhaps it is only natural that Amer icans should be the chief chafers—more chafed against than chafing, as it were. France and England and Belgium did their chafing carly, while America de ayed her decision, Now that it has come our turn to chafe, by all means let us chafe. Only let us remember that the Congress will have to do a lot ica can say she has had her full share of the chafing comicbooks.com w