Life, 1919-01-16 · page 22 of 34
Life — January 16, 1919 — page 22: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**"At Target Practice"** (top cartoon): A military officer sarcastically criticizes a rookie's poor marksmanship. The rookie defensively claims he hit the water—a literal excuse that misses the point entirely. The humor lies in the rookie's obliviousness: he's so far off-target that hitting water (presumably near the target) is somehow presented as acceptable. It satirizes making excuses for failure. **"The Ruined Millionaire"** (main story): A wealthy, bedridden man asks his nurse if she's happier than he is. She answers yes. His realization: he spent life controlling everything (including people), becoming enslaved by his own rigid system and wealth. She found happiness by accepting life's uncontrollability. The satire critiques wealthy self-made men whose pursuit of absolute control over circumstances and people ultimately creates their own misery, while simpler people find contentment in acceptance.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
AT TARGET PRACTICE Officer (sarcastically Rookie (modestly): "YES, siz; BUT, AIN'T MOVING The Ruined Millionaire HE multimillionaire sat half up in bed with his head back on the skil- He had been His es focussed on the trained moving about the fully arranged pillows. quite ill, but he was better now sharp gra nurse room, “Miss Kent,” he said, “I want to ask you a question. Will you promise to answer truthfully I warn you it’s personal.” T'll try.” Are you happier than I am?” The trained nurse paused, but for a moment only. noisclessly ? WELL, YOU DID HIT THE WATER pips’? you? YOU SEE, IT'S A QUIET DAY, AND IT AwouT UCIT “Yes,” she said. “Why “don't know—perhaps | haven't so much to bother m “You ha sume.” ¢ your troubles, I pre- “Yes, sir, But T don’t think about them, a matter of tempera- ment. The nurse arranged the light so it wouldn't shine in his eyes. She turned off the steam. “LT don't said, Neither do I. But I have had time to go over the matter during the past quite think that,” she few days, and I have discovered the reason.” The nurse went on straightening out the room. “You mustn't d. talk too much,” she t's because I'm selfish and you arc It’s the difference between con- and not controll not. trolling them.” “Take this, please.” “Bah! You see, from the time | was a boy I got into the habit of controlling things. If there was anything wrong in me, I corrected it. 1 wasn't going to have anything stand out against me I took pains to sce that nothing would ever control me. Then I my own way. Understand?” “Yes, sir. Turn over, ple: “Now, you didn’t. Others controlled you. You got into the habit of doing what they wanted. By and by you live only for others—and forgot yourseli I lived for myself and forgot others except as I could use them. That's why you are happier than I am. | created a system that haunts me. | My money My sys tem was too perfect, and I can’t get out of it. Horrible! I couldn't have discovered the truth anywhere else here. things had things am restless; you are calm. disturbs me—yours doesn't. he nurse turned down the light. “If you want me, ring,” she said “Thank you, sir—you shouldn't have talked so much, Good night.” Out in the hall she met the doctor. “How's number two, nurse?” “His pulse and temperature are SAVE THOSE TEARS —