Life, 1918-12-05 · page 25 of 76
Life — December 5, 1918 — page 25: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains Christmas-themed satirical content typical of early-20th-century Life magazine humor. **"A Vignette"** is a lighthearted poem depicting chaotic holiday domesticity—children destroying toys and furniture while celebrating Christmas, culminating in the kitten catching a candy decoration. The gentle satire mocks the messy reality of family celebrations versus idealized Christmas imagery. **"No Help for It"** presents a brief dialogue joke: a traveling salesman asks a hotel proprietor about evening entertainment in a small town. The proprietor's response—that locals are busy sorting "junk and packing boxes for the Red Cross"—satirizes wartime charitable efforts, suggesting even small-town residents are mobilized for the war effort, leaving no time for amusement. **"Hymen's Drill"** parodies military wedding ceremonies by presenting elaborate "Matrimonial Drill Regulations" in military language (cadence, formations, manual of arms). This satirizes both the formality of military weddings and the absurdity of applying rigid military precision to marriage ceremonies. **"The Skeptic"** illustration appears to show a cynical character—likely representing wartime skepticism or doubt.
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Christmas Life A Vignette HE. baby rolled across the floor And grabbed a sugar-plum. losephus, who is nearly four, Paraded with a drum. Marie and Helen made the place A roller-skating rink, While Peter broke the dolly’s face To analyze her wink. \nd as the noise of childish glee Ke-cchoed through the house, The kitten climbed the Christmas tree And caught a candy mouse! J No Help for It T* AVELING SALESMAN (in stern hamlet): Any amusement going on to-night in this God-forsaken HOW TO CHOOSE A CHRISTMAS GIFT TO SUIT YOUR FRIENDS pl Proprietor or Horrs.: Yes, sir, They , + want some help ‘sorting junk and pack- Hymen s Dull ing boxes fer the sakes tnneh of ‘OR the information and guidance of all concerned, the following Matrimonial — the Red Cross. Drill Regulations for military weddings are published: 1. The march of the bridal party up the aisle of the church will be af atten- tion. A cadence of eighty steps to the minute will he maintained for the length of the march. 2, Unless otherwise announced, the guide is right as the party proceeds toward the altar, 3. The guests will execute eves right or eves left, as the case may he, as the bride, groom and their respective staffs march toward their ob- jective. 4. The father of the bride, after having given her in marriage, will right oblique and continue to march until he has deployed himself from the bridal party proper. 3. The bridal party, as it aligns itself in front of the altar, will dress on the best man. 6. Ring bearers, Nower girls, pages, etc., will act as file closers, 7. During the ceremony the guests will remain at pare ade rest. 8. When the party has arranged itself in a . front formation, the officiating clergyman will take his place two paces in front and will read the Artic Matrimon, 9. Immediately after the ceremony the command af case will be given. (Note. Bride and groom are not ex pected to be at ease, however.) 10. The bridal party will execute an about face after the ceremony and will then cowntermarch. On gaining the vestibule of the church, the manual of arms will be executed by the bride and groom as they receive the congratulatory handshakes of the reviewing The wedding party and guests will fall out as soon as they leave the church. Neal R. O'Hara, THE SKEPTIC