Life, 1918-11-28 · page 32 of 34
Life — November 28, 1918 — page 32: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several brief satirical anecdotes typical of early 20th-century American humor magazines. The main pieces include: **"Janet's Protest"**: A child humorously demands food after being ignored by a talkative hostess—gentle satire on adults' self-absorption. **"Black Eyes" and other short jokes**: Quick satirical quips about character traits and human behavior, sourced from various newspapers. **"A Little of Both"**: Wordplay humor where an aunt misinterprets military "setting-up exercises" as "sitting down exercises"—gentle comedy on generational misunderstanding. **"Flatly Impossible"**: A wartime-era joke about a man wanting to farm potatoes but unable to because his yard is flat (unclear if this is absurdist humor or references actual WWI victory garden propaganda). The page is primarily **advertising-driven**, with prominent ads for Fownes gloves ("standard of glove quality"), Phocoana Evans Ale, and Cuticura products. The humor is mild, family-friendly, and apolitical—typical of Life's comedic formula during this period.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Janet's Protest Janet, aged nine, was taken by her mother to lunch at the house of a friend. The hostess was of the talkative va- riety, and, in her enjoyment of certain interesting little incidents she was relat- ing, quite forgot to give Janet anything in the shape of food. Alter a lapse of several minutes Janct could endure this situation no longer. So, raising her plate as high as she could, she demanded in a shrill voice: “ Anybody here want a clean plate erybody's Magazine. Black Eyes “They say.” remarked the moralizer, “that aggressive and impulsive people usually have black eyes.” “That's right,” rejoined the demoral- izer. “If they are not born with them they manage to acquire them later.” Indianapolis Star. Equal to It ot you sold me is three feet “Yes, it is, and you know it is.” “Well, it's a good thing you told me. I can let you have a bargain in a canoe.” —Lonisville Courier-Journal, The name is always the glove, “In the Service!” Among the military, as with glove wearers generally, FOWNES is reputedly the stand- ard of glove quality and value. Leather, fur, silk or fabric. At the Principal Shops. American art and skill have produced. A Little of Both Aunt cy was visiting an army camp, and as she approached some rookies were sitting on their heels and then rising to a standing position in per- fect unison. “What are the boys doing now?” she asked “Why, those are the setting-up exer cises,” explained an obliging sergeant. “Humph!" remarked auntie. “ Looks to me more like scttin’ down exercises.” —Indianapotis Star. Flatly Impossible “Yes,” said Simpkins, “I want to do my bit, of course, so I thought I'd raise some potatoes.” “Well, I thought I would do that too,” said Smith, “but when I looked up the way to do it I found that potatoes have to be planted in hills, and our yard is perfectly flat.” —Pittsburgh Chronicle-Telegraph, Ripened Judgment “Then we're engaged?” “ OF course.” nd I am the first girl you ever No, dear, but I'm harder to suit now than I ysed to be. —Kansas City Journal. “ T' “AS the night before Christmas And all through the house Not a creature was stirring ”— except the wise and thoughtful head of the family, who was writing out the cards which announced to the happy recipients that they would cach receive as a Christmas gift a year’s subscrip- tion to Lire, WOUND STRIPES FOR STAY-AT-HOMES, “An American Beverage for an American Toast First, last and all the time Upto Date Grocers, Drugzists and Dealers Cc. H. EVANS & SONS Estab. HUDSON.N. ¥.