Life, 1918-09-26 · page 28 of 33
Life — September 26, 1918 — page 28: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
## Main Content: "To Norah—1918" A poem by Miriam Clark Potter celebrating a domestic cook who agrees to stay employed for a modest $25/day raise during WWI. The tone is satirical—the family ironically celebrates this "fortune" while acknowledging their own financial desperation (they've sold their piano and pawned their car). The poem mocks both the family's neediness and their obsequious gratitude toward household help, with illustrations showing a man literally on his knees to keep the cook employed. ## "Whispers from Washington" A satirical column criticizing the House Committee on the District of Columbia for proposing absurd legislative solutions during wartime (the German offensive was ongoing). Specific targets include: - A rent-profiteering bill deemed laughably unworkable - A weapons bill with impractically severe penalties - Attempting to convert military supply departments into retail grocery stores for Congressional convenience while the War Department desperately mobilized for the war effort A final anecdote ridicules military officers who disapprove when one officer gives his seat to a woman—mocking rigid military decorum as obstacles to civilian respect. The page satirizes wartime mismanagement and civilian absurdity.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
460 To Norah—1918 ING the bells and fly the flags, The cook is going to stay! And only for the paltry raise Of dollars ten 'Tis very, very good indeed When many others are in need To choose unworthy us to feed For such a meagre pay! Fly the flags and sound the gong, The cook will not depart; For only twenty-five a day She'll take us to her heart. We've sold the Steinway, pawned the car, Our shoes, they will not travel f What matters this, when such things are As sweetless, rye-meal tart? O, let us all eat humble pie And not rejoice too much; nis fortune, undeserved by all May vanish at a touch. “Tis true, this bird has flown our way, ‘Tis possible that she may stay, 3ut when we are such common clay How can we hope for such? g So, Norah, whims Beneath your priceless boot, And commandeer the sleeping porch To practice on the flute, We shall not have a word to say, We're stricken dumb. Just have your though you stamp. our way, For well you know this is your day, And we must all salute! Miriam Clark Potter. SS I'LL HAVE TO GET UP OFF MY KN “o-on! Whispers from Washington HE clown in the House of Representatives is the Committee on the District of Columbia. The remedy “it proposed to cure rent- profiteering elicited gales of laughter from everyone hav- ing an clemental knowledge of the principles of law. It is considering a bill, alleged to regulate instalment houses, which, in effect, would prevent the extension of credit by retail merchants. It proposed a bill to pre- vent carrying concealed weapons, with penalties so drastic, providing life im- prisonment for a repetition of the offense, that it would be practicai!y im- possible to secure the conviction of an offender by a jury. OTHER brilliant: exhibition by the committee was its proposal to compel the Quartermi ster Department S IP I EXPECT TO KEEP UP WITH HER! LOOK, MOTHER! YOU CAN SEE THE PARADE THROUGH HERE! of the Army, and the Bureau of Sup- plies and Accounts of the Navy to furnish from their commissary stores supplies at cost to all employees and officials of the government, including members of Congress, living in Wash- ington. The passage of this measure was urged without consulting the War and Navy Departments as to the feasi- bility of setting them up in the retail grocery business with over twenty thousand customers. The German drive was then at its height, the War Department was making superhuman efforts to rush men and supplies across in response to the cries for help, and the Navy Department was straining every nerve to insure the safety of the transportations. “ Forget it,” said the committee, “we want cheap groceries for Congressmen and govern- ment clerks.” The House ruthlessly struck the enacting clause from the bill, and the committee then busied itself huge with a measure to protect the learned and honored. profession that is com- monly known as corn-doctoring. HE other day a swivel-chair officer surrendered his seat in a street car to a woman. The entire car gasped with astonishment, and his fellow offi- cers glared with disapproval at the iconoclast. If sucha breach of decorum of one of their own number is to be condoned, how forces of the military service command the respect of mere civilians? an the fountain-pen