Life, 1918-06-13 · page 14 of 36
Life — June 13, 1918 — page 14: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains WWI-era satire (circa 1918, based on the caption). **"Short History of the Huns"** is a darkly comic countdown poem mocking German military losses, using "Huns" as a derogatory term for Germans. It catalogs diminishing Teutonic forces through battles, ending with a single survivor watching the Rhine—a bitter joke about German defeat. **"Don't Damn the Russians"** argues against blaming Russians for early war failures, contextualizing Russian struggles as products of systemic dysfunction rather than inherent inferiority. It reflects Allied frustration with Russia's early performance. **"German Spies Interned"** is a brief note about captured German operatives. The large cartoon depicts recruits in 1918 beginning military training—likely commenting on American mobilization or conscription at the war's final stage.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
“TP IPRAE ° Short History of the Huns EN Million Teutons rushing from the Rhine; Belgium up and bit em, then there were Nine. Nine Million Teutons singing songs of hate; Tommy Atkins bashed ’em, and then there were Eight Eight Million Teutons sent by Gott from heaven; Little Servia swiped ’em, and then there were Seven. Seven Million Teutons playing poison tricks; Russia rushed ’em in the East, then there were Six. Six Million Teutons in a Verdun drive; A poilu person punched ’em, then there were Five. Five Million Teutons, grunting still for gore: Italia aids the Entente, then there were Four. Four Million Teutons, still murdering at sea; Depth-bombs busted 'em, then there were but Three. Three Million Teutons bound to break right through; General Foch cried “ Forward!” and cut them in Two. Two Million Teutons, sunburnt in “the sun”: The Yanks took on their stride at last, then there was but One. One Million Teutons, watching on the Rhine: Hinden-burgle homes again? . Ni Also, Nein WT. Larned. Don’t Damn the Russians ON’T damn the Russians—at least don’t damn them until you have reeled through your mind a moving picture of Europe in 1014, as it would have been, if the Russians then were, as they are now, conglomerates of distraction and impotence, incapable of making the eastern front a menace to the Hun and preventing the concentra- tion of his hordes in the west. When you have done this, and given to the picture some little contemplation, you may damn the Russians as much as you may be disposed. But don’t damn them even then, if you value your reputation for sanity; and don't, if you care a rap for your personal safety, damn them where you may be overheard by some- one who will likely, from a sense of gratitude for what these people did for democracy early in the war, resent your remarks with quite proper and sanguinary violence. “German Spies Interned™ a quite common announcement in the papers nowadays, and is no doubt eminently ing to the pacifists. Possibly it may meet with the approval of the father whose son has been killed in a munition-plant explosion. How would it be to arrange for appropriate preliminary exercises, have the spelling changed a bit, and then let it read, “Four German Spies Jnterred "? THE CLASS OF 1938, BY UNANIMOUS CONSENT, RESOLVE To BE N THEIR MILITARY TRAINID GAT ONCE Comicbook Pxun