Life, 1918-05-09 · page 8 of 40
Life — May 9, 1918 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two distinct sections: **"The Ship of France"** - A patriotic poem praising French naval courage, attributed to Richard Le Gallienne. It celebrates France as a brave vessel navigating dangerous seas, using maritime metaphors for national pride and freedom. **"Past History Rewritten"** - A satirical piece mocking bureaucratic incompetence. Two unnamed gentlemen are tasked with finishing creation of "the world," but their work is interrupted by contradictory orders requiring complete restarts. The satire critiques administrative dysfunction and endless revision—likely commentary on wartime or contemporary government inefficiency. **"Target Practice"** - Four cartoon panels (right side) depict "Fritz" (German soldier stereotype) and "Pickelheim" in military training scenarios, showing Allied soldiers' competitive target practice with German opponents. This reflects WWI-era satirical humor. **"Some Real Wants"** - Brief section sardonically listing wartime labor shortages and profiteering.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
748 The Ship of France RAVE Fleur-de-Lis! Strong ship of France, That on disaster's stormiest sea Laughs at mischance— Making your history one long romance. However high The mad sea rolls, Gallant against the bl Captain of souls, Fearless of lurking rocks and luring shoals, ckest sky, Proudly you ride, Ship of the Free; In courage proud, if that be pride, And Liberty— Till the last trumpet blows o'er the last sea. Richard Le Gallicnne, Past History Rewritten TH : seven days, and the question arose as to who should have the contract. After some discussion it was agreed to place the order in the hands of two gentlemen, neither of whom had any authority to decide anything. One of these gentlemen, who had some expert knowledge of making worlds, having read several hooks on the subject and taken a course in college, secured the aerial space for a plant and proceeded with the jal construction. On the morning of the second day, however, he was rudely interrupted by a mes- sage from the second gentleman, who stated that he had just been informed of a number of improvements that must be incorporated into the original scheme. On the morning of the third day these were countermanded, and a complete new set substituted. This re- quired making a fresh start. At the end of three months the world not having yet been begun, someone sug- gested that possibly any world, rather than none at all, would have been bet- ter, and telephoned to headquarters This led to the famous order that any. one in the universe who dared to anything derogatory to the administra- tion would be considered as giving aid and comfort to the enemy. world was to be finished in USSIA'S EPITAPH: In Gott we trusted! At the Imperial schutzenfest Fritz Pickelheim led all the rest; ST : a k SPA Le it SF At target practice Pickelheim Could hit the Red Cross every time; At the clay-baby contest Fritz Scored nineteen out of twenty hits; And once he won the Kaiser's purse With nine live babies and a nurse. Some Real Wants ANTED: Just-as-good-as war workers, who spend their time in talking of their great deeds, to work on ships. Wanted: Just-as-good-as ladies, who have hitherto passed their time in wearing good clothes and indulging in sports, to work on farms. Wanted: Just-as-good-as army contractors, who furnish paper shoes at two hundred per cent. profit, to take government jobs. Wanted: A just-as-good-as peace—with or without decisive victory. For what is victory? A Bolsheviki idiom. Comicbook seca