Life — December 27, 1917 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

1080 TRAGIC EVENT Well-Known Citizen Suddenly Dies UST as Broadway was at its bright- est last evening, the sidewalks crowded with the merry throngs leav- ing the theatres and everything redo- lent of the life in which he has for so many years been a conspicuous figure, Mr. A. Knightley Rounder, the well- known man about town, suddenly passed over to the great majority. Mr. Rounder, apparently in the best of health and spirits, and as always im- maculately attired, had just entered the side door of the Astorbocker Hotel and stopped to read this notice, which had lately been posted alongside the coat- room door: TO OUR PATRONS The hotel and restaurant men of New York have recently shown their Patriotism and their desire to con- serve the food of our country by cut- ting the size of restaurant portions in half and doubling the prices. Governed by the same patriotic im- pulse, they have decided to abolish that public pest known as the hat- check boy. Hereafter they will pay these attendants a living wage and will promptly discharge any of them accepting tips from patrons. In place of these tips a uniform charge of one dollar per person will be added to cach restaurant check. As Mr. Rounder finished reading this notice, he immediately dropped to the floor, completely dead. Coroner Nealy was summoned at once, and, after examining the body and reading the notice, decided that an inquest was unnecessary. Hoke Smith Dissents October 4th Lire copied from the Cripple Creek Times and Vic- tor Record the Imperial German Honor List, as imagined by that paper, in which the Iron Cross is conferred on six senators of the United States, in- cluding both senators from \ issouri, both from Georgia, and one each from Wisconsin and Oklahoma. Senator Hoke Smith of Georgia has had his attention called to this list, and feels that it should not have included DICTATORS him. “Such a use of my name,” he ites, “ was utterly inexcusable. When Germany announced her purpose to sink our vessels and drown our citi- zens, and further sought to induce the invasion of our soil by other countries, I supported without hesitation the declaration of war. Since that time I have supported every measure which in my opinion was calculated to strength- en our country in the struggle, to help it fight fast and fight hard.” The senator quotes from speeches he made in the Senate on April 17th, July 7th and July 19th (copies of which he sends us), all showing ardor for the prosecution of the war and helpfulness in providing necessary legislation, It is a pleasure to record this evidence that, whatever his sentiments may have been before last April, he got into the war on the same side with the rest of us. Serious Times N'l it time to make your New Year resolutions?” “No; this isn’t any year for experi- ments.” F'Rst DOCTOR: Was your opera- tion to-day a success? Seconp Doctor: I made a success- ful cut into the patient’s eastern front and received an indemnity of five hun- dred dollars, comicbooks