Life, 1917-12-20 · page 16 of 40
Life — December 20, 1917 — page 16: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**Content Overview:** This page contains a poem "An American Girl" by Clinton Scollard praising an idealized American woman, accompanied by two separate satirical cartoons. **Top Cartoon ("Somewhere in France"):** Shows a soldier hanging a Christmas stocking while abroad during World War I—likely referencing American troops deployed in France. The humor centers on maintaining holiday traditions despite wartime displacement. **Bottom Cartoon ("Pandora's Box"):** A mother reassures her child that weekend guests are "all your father's friends," not actual people of social prominence. The illustration shows a cigar box labeled "El Abominacion / Poor Habana," suggesting the humor derives from the father's questionable taste in companions or cigars. **"Why Not?" Essay:** A satirical piece arguing that churches suffer declining male attendance because sermons (mere opinions) bore people. The writer suggests replacing preachers with popular short-story authors like Robert Chambers or Gouverneur Morris to make religion more entertaining—a tongue-in-cheek critique of both clergy and commercialized entertainment culture.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
An American Girl SHE who has moods that are merrily mutable— All of the glamours and graces of spring, How shall I sing her a song that is suitable? Tell me. Muses, oh, how shall I sing? Turn me a tune that is fitting, Terpsichore! Fain would I know how the numbers should flow; Teach me, Calliope, some of your trickery— How to range rhymes in a rapturous ro I must use simile; 1 must use metaphor; Get my best rhetoric down from the shelf; Find something charming, and find something pretty for One who's so charming and pretty herself! I must display my dexterity verbally That I may render her praise which is due; Haply you may think I speak in hyperbole; Could you but see her you'd swear it was true. I might compare her to one of the godde: But you'd consider my brain in a whirl, And I’m aware, in the trimmest of bodices, . She’s just a dutiful, beautiful girl! One who would scorn in this hour which is tragical < Slacking, or shrinking from playing her part; < —— One who is loyal and lovely and magical ; TRV IS eS One who's American—leal to the heart! Clinton Scollard. SOMEWHERE IN FRANCE HANGING UP HIS CHRISTMAS STOCKING Why Not? WRITER in the Christian Evangelist has let the cat out of the bag when, in a recent issue, he declares that: social prominence, mother?” “ Many people like entertainment in the pulpit better than “Dear me, no, child! They are all your father’s friends.” the Gospel.” “ ARE the people who are coming this week-end of any But do they get it? And does this fact account for the scarcity of men in churches? It ought to be appreciated that the real trouble does not lie with the preachers, for the only thing they can do is to preach, and, after all, preaching is only an opinion, and nobody cares for opinions. Instead of being forced to deliver opinions every Sunday, our ministers might take a course in short-story writing, and deliver a story in lieu of a sermon. Or might it not be better to make our popular short-story writers over into ministers, and thus give them possibly a wider audience than they now have in some of the magazines? For the business of reading short stories in magazines has been seriously declining of late. If Robert Chambers or Governeur Morris, for example, could take a theological course and furnish a short story every week, a lot of people might take more than a passing interest in religion. =’S a really distinguished author, isn’t he?” “T don’t think so, They say his books are all best- sellers,” PANDORA'S BOX comicbooks Eom