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Life, 1917-11-22 · page 36 of 44

Life — November 22, 1917 — page 36: what you’re looking at

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Life — November 22, 1917 — page 36: Life, 1917-11-22

What you’re looking at

This page is primarily **advertisements** for diamonds and dental products, with satirical commentary embedded in the text. The main satire appears in "A Benefactor" section: it mockingly describes a Kansas inventor's system for DIY metal tooth implants. The humor is **deadpan absurdist satire**—Life presents this dangerous procedure as practical advice, complete with instructions to "bore a hole in the jaw-bone" using a gimlet, avoid hitting nerves, and take a six-week vacation for healing. The satire targets **early-1900s American entrepreneurialism and mail-order instruction schemes**—the idea that any complex procedure could be learned at home through correspondence courses. It's mocking both the inventor's dubious claims and public gullibility toward such schemes. The final aside about "Decolleté or Negligée" appears unrelated, likely transitioning to another article. The diamond ads represent standard period advertising; the satire lies in juxtaposition with the obviously dangerous tooth-implant scheme.

📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

wn DIAMONDS sea FROM JASON WEILER & SONS diamond importers, and save 2 For over 41 years the house of Jason wei Boston has been one of the leading diamond importing con- selling to jewelers. However, a large jone direct by mail with customer Here are several diamond offers. you by mail—which clearly demonstrate out position to name prices on diamonds that should surely interest any present or prospective purchaser: eat Ladies’ Diamond Ring an oslicate 205.00 S. Our price oa ‘This ting Is made of all platinum, richly carved and pierced is the new Lice-work effect. Set with perlectly cut, blue-white diamcod. Newest Design 3% carat . Men's Diamond Ring \ carat . 3{ carat. 1% carats . 2 carats . MTree aa digit» 2 cA - 512.00 ‘lsewhere for less Money rebinded without a quibUle i not entirely satished. We refer you as to our reliability to any bank or newspaper in Boston. If desired rings will be sent to your Bank or any Express Co,, vilege of examination. ur diamond guarantee for full value for all time goes with every purchat WRITE TODAY DIAMONDS This book is beautifully il- lustrated. Tells how to select and buy diay Tells how they it and market dia- . This book, show- ¢ weights, sizes and prices ($10 to $10,000), is considered an authority. A copy will be mailed te you FR on receipt of your name and address. Jason Weiler & Sons 371 Washington Street, Boston, Mass, Diamond Importers since 1876 Foreign Agencies: Amsterdam and Paris A Benefactor MAN in Kansas has invented a new system whereby metal roots can be used for teeth. It is expected that he will open a correspondence school, so that any family or private individual can easily, with a little prac- tice, have renewed teeth. The process is very simple. You first remove, with an ordinary pair of forceps, the shop-worn tooth, which has, so to speak, scen better days. You then take a gimlet and bore a hole in the jaw-bone. The metal root is then quickly and deftly inserted, and at your leisure you can secure any shade of tooth you desire and screw it firmly onto the metal root. The inventor says that it is neces- sary for the root to fit exactly into the hole that has been made by the instrument, and it is quite possible that upon your first trial there might be some slight discrepancy, but a little scraping and filing will easily make the juncture complete. All that then re- mains is for the jaw-bone to unite firmly around the metal tooth. This takes, as a rule, about six weeks. It is recommended that you take your annual vacation about this time, be- cause while the jaw-bone is uniting it will be harder than usual to settle down to your regular occupation and you will need as much diversion as possible. Be careful in selecting the teeth (which can be obtained at any reliable dental shop) to get them all of the same shade, because it is very annoy- ing after they have once been placed in position to discover that they. are uneven in color. This might excite the derision of your friends. In case you should prefer having the work done by your regular dentist, you must bear in mind that the ex- pense will be considerably more than if you did it yourself, and where the cost of living is so high, it is believed that most people will prefer to do the work in their own homes, especially as it offers a new method of killing time. One thing more. In boring into the jaw-bone, it is just as well, if possible, to avoid any of the nerves which may he there. Bore around them. An Deécolleté or Negligée> —both, if really smart, present the problem “How to secure a smooth dainty under- arm?" The answer lies in the occasional use of Gvanss Depilatory It removes superfluous hair temporar nothing will do it permanently without risk 50. for complete and convenient outfit, at your own drug or department store. Or back without question, if you want it GEORGE B EVANS 1108 Chestnut St Philadelphia Pa Makers of “ Mum” ng your dealer. Money HIS instrument has been built and is intended for those who desire the nearest possible approach to perfection in ac- curate, expressive, and beautiful sound reproduction. For un- equalled richness hear and see THE INSTRUMENT OF QUALITY OT; CLEAR AS A ort At the Panama Pacific Exposition the only jury which heard and tested all of the phonographs recommended that the Sonora be given a marking for tone quality higher than that given to any other phonograph or talking machine. You are cordially invited to examine the Sonora and judge its exceilencefor yourself. If among our many models you do not find one that exactly sutable for your home, we are prepared to make special art models to order Hear the Sonora first! $50, $55. $60. $75, $100, $110, $135, $150, $175, $200, $250, $375, $500, $1000 Write for the latest catalog L-62 Honora Pbhorograph Sales Company, Jue. GEORGE E. BRIGHTSON, Presiders 279 Broadway, New York City Sonera is hcensed and operates under BASIC PATENTS of the phonograph industry. The Highest Class Talking Machine in the World active nerve ensconced in a jaw-bone is always looking for trouble, and when disturbed is very likely to make it. IND is always an unhappy, dise cd and oppressed country, may believe the orators who are ale ys looking for a bit of American money to save Ireland and keep them- selves going. The friends of Ireland in America ought to cheer up their native land by subscribing for a num- ber of copies of Lire to alleviate the misery of their compatriots. comicbook cu