Life — August 23, 1917 — page 34: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Another Engagement An Italian, having applied for citizen- ship, was being examined in the naturali- zation court. Who is the President of the United A Ready-Witted Parson The evening lesson was from the Book of Job, and the minister had just read, “Yea, the light of the wicked shall be put out,” when immediately the church was in total darkness. “Brethren,” said the minister, with scarcely a moment's pause, “in view of the sudden and startling fulfilment of this prophecy, we will spend a few min- utes in silent. psayer for the electric lighting company.” —Boston Transcript. Some Would Rather Die Than Diet Food control only asks that you diet for your country; not die. —Baltimore American, “Who is the Vice-President?” “Mr. Marsh’ “Tf the President would be President?” Mr. Marsh’.” “Could you be President?” | | “Why “Mister, you ‘scuse, please. I vera should die, who then busy worka da mine.” erybody’s, Roget's New Address “Can you tell me where I can find a good thesaurus?” “Have you tried the Museum of Nat- ural History ?""—The Lamb. Fortuxe Truurr: There is trouble coming in your household from a blonde ark man, come. Our Swedish i Tue reopening of the Russia cam- paign in the East is very pleasing to Shodeof W. Sse ver’s op z0'onw or these woman and a everybody in the United States except PROBLEM PLAYS. Patwox: I the linotype operators. Shade of Joc Miller: xo, Xo. A MUSICAL cook eloped with the coal man. —Southern Lumberman, COMEDY, I'LL FEEL MORE AT HOME THERE, —Baltimore American, Lire is published every Thursday, simultaneously in the United States, Great Britain, Lire is for sale by all newsdealers in Great Britain and may be obtained from book Canada and British Possessions. Title registered in U. S. Patent Office. $5.00 a year sellers in all the principal cities in the world. The foreign trade supplied from i? . Offi Rolls House, Breams Build » London, E. C. in advance. Additional postage to foreign countries in the Postal Union, $1.04 a year: to Canada, ents. Ingle current copies, to cents. Back numbers, after three months date of publication, 25 cents. Issues prior to 1910 out of pri The text and illustrations in Lire are copyrighted. For Reprint Rights in Great Britain epply to Live, Rolls House, Breams Buildings, Fetter Lane, London, E. C., England, Live's Lond: N d addressed HM be returne nm of unse docs not hold itse unless accompanied by ‘stamped If responsible for the loss or now-re of address should reach this ten days prior to the date of “Out, Damned Spot!” To accomplish this result there is noth- ing better than one of Lire’s blotters. A package of these remarkably absorbent and intellectually companionable blotters will be sent to any address on receipt of a two-cent stamp. he ie Champagne of Table 17 West 31st Street New York SENT YOU FROM FRANCE WES Sold Everywhere comicbookaa |