Life, 1916-11-23 · page 14 of 40
Life — November 23, 1916 — page 14: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two distinct items from *Life* magazine (circa 1916, based on the note about contributions): **Left: "Epitaphs on the Kaiser"** — A poem viciously attacking Kaiser Wilhelm II of Germany, written during World War I. It catalogs his alleged crimes: starting the war, killing civilians, murdering soldiers, and destroying homes. The epithets ("execrable monster," "assassin," "bloodthirsty tyrant") reflect intense American anti-German propaganda of the era. **Right: "A Good Man Honored"** — An article praising Harvard railroad president Howard Elliott, elected to lead the Harvard Alumni Association. Below is a cartoon showing a German military officer (identifiable by the spiked Prussian helmet) instructing another figure to read propaganda, captioned "When you finish that, Father, you must read this"—likely satirizing German attempts to spread pro-war messaging. The page reflects deep American wartime hostility toward Germany.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
‘LIF E* Epitaphs on the Kaiser (Note to contributors: No more contributions for this department received after noon, November 16, 1916.) CURIOUS combination, Me und Gott! And one of them lies buried in this spot. In heaven the Kaiser was not forgotten; On the pearly gates he saw “ Verboten!” When Bill descended to the shades The Devil shouted to his aids: “We'll have to raise more hell, we wi Or this won't seem like home to Bill!” Beneath this narrow strip of sod The German Kaiser lies, thank God! With Charon by the river Styx Stands Bill without his crown; They're waiting for a submarine To take the Kaiser down. Because of what a suffering world endured, This dead king’s goodness often was obscured. Little Willie's dead and gone; He neither shrieks nor hollers— His Kriegspiel’s cost was armies lost And forty billion dollars. Lies here the Kaiser. God was the wiser. Here lies the Kaiser Bill—and so “Praise God, from whom all blessings flow”! From a German Subscriber Here lies the Kaiser, scorned by you, Yet better men, I find, are few. Brave and strong in trouble and strife, Would that the same could be said of Lire! Here lies Kaiser Wilhelm— An execrable monster ; An assassin of defenseless men, women and chil- dren; A murderer of countless thousands of his fellow men; A despoiler of his country ; A wrecker of peaceful homes ; Despised, detested and abhorred of all men. With Judas, Pontius Pilate and Herod, his name will be handed down from generation to generation as A heartless, merciless, pitiless, bloodthirsty tyrant, Unmourned and unsung. A Good Man Honored OWARD ELLIOTT, President of the New Haven railroad, has been chosen President for the coming year of the Harvard Alumni Association. His duties will consist chiefly of presiding at the speech- making at the next Harvard Commencement, and of mak- ing a speech himself. Mr. Elliott had plenty of duties already, being fastened to about the hardest railroad job in the country. His strength, though much beyond ordinary, is hardly equal to the severity of his task, and it seems a pity to add any- thing to his burdens. Nevertheless, this handsome Harvard compliment has been well bestowed in that it gives to his remarkable la- bors a valuable non-partisan endorsement by his peers. He is trying to pull New England’s greatest railroad out of a bog. This Harvard recognition is an expression of New England’s admiration for his efforts and of confi- dence that he will do the job. “I SUPPOSE you want rubber tires?” said the carriage man to a parsimonious old fellow who was inspecting several vehicles with a view to buying one. “No, sir,” said the old man, “my folks ain't that kind. When they’re ridin’ they want ter know it!” “WHEN YOU FINISH THAT, FATHER, YOU MUST READ THIS” icbooks.com