Life, 1916-08-31 · page 8 of 34
Life — August 31, 1916 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains satirical commentary on Alabama's education law and a humorous political speech. **"In Darkest Alabama"** criticizes Alabama's compulsory education law as inadequate—requiring only 60 days of schooling yearly for children ages 8-15, which the author argues is insufficient progress compared to other states. **"Little Speeches for Great Occasions"** presents a mock Congressional victory speech (signed "D.B.") from an elected official thanking supporters while promising to prioritize personal advancement in Washington. The cartoons illustrate everyday scenes: one shows a traveling salesman or politician greeting rural citizens; another titled "Family Secrets" depicts four figures in conversation, likely representing gossip or private matters becoming public. The page satirizes both political inadequacy regarding education and self-serving politician rhetoric.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
“LI In Darkest Alabama HE heading over this paragraph is misleading and un- just. It appears, according to recent legislation, that Alabama is soon to emerge from darkness, if not into the pitiless white glare of modern educational methods, at least into the light glow of the early dawn of progress. The new compulsory education law is regarded as the most im- portant of the school legislations adopted. Says the Bir- mingham Alabama Ledger: This bill provides that all children between the ages of cight and fifteen years must attend school for a term of eighty days out of each scholastic year. . . The bill provides that this term of eighty days may be reduced by the County Board of Education of a mu- nicipality to a term of sixty days should such a course be deemed necessary or expedient. Such a course might doubtless be deemed expedient and necessary if there are enough cotton mills in the immedi neighborhood to keep the children out of mischief. Still, we must not cavil. It may have taken Alabama a hundred years or more to send her children to school even for sixty days in the year. But Alabama is getting there. In the course of the next hundred years she may be on the same educational basis as the majority of the other states in the Union. Little Speeches for Great Occasions Upon Being Elected Congressman LLOW CITIZENS: Having for the’ past year pulled I the strings I could get hold of, having paid out large sums of money and connived with unscrupulous poli- ticians for this position, it would have been a matter of great surprise to me had I not won at the recent election. I was particularly careful to have enough voters on hand to assure my triumph, and as an added precaution [ had cultivated the friendship of the Election Judges. My opponent, being an honest man and exceedingly stupid, did FAMILY SECRETS FE * i My Se OUR CITIZEN SOLDIERY Private Biggs (whose period of training is over): ser HERE, CAP'N MIGGS, NOW THAT I AM A CIVILIAN AGAIN WANT YoU TO UD SALUTES I'VE GIVEN YOU SINCE I CAME HERE. none of these things, so it is no wonder to me that he was beaten. When I get to Washington I will devote my entire energy to my own personal advancement, without regard for the interests of the country at large. I will try to secure enough patrimony for my home town to make sure my re-election; but beyond that I will not go. I intend to serve myself, respect the Capitalists and fear the Trusts. Thank you one and all for the honor you did not know that you were going to do me. America forever! D. B. HEN lawyers work with a will there is trouble in store for the heirs,