Life, 1916-06-08 · page 45 of 46
Life — June 8, 1916 — page 45: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This satirical poem mocks medical overreach and the early-20th-century obsession with serums and vaccines. A well-meaning doctor injects his daughter with numerous serums—derived from horses, cows, sheep, rabbits, and guinea pigs—claiming to prevent various diseases. The joke escalates absurdly: after all these treatments, the girl becomes a bizarre chimera, "part horse, part cow, part sheep, part goat," who "bleats and chews her cud." The satire targets two concerns: the indiscriminate use of animal-derived medical treatments (then genuine medical practice) and the hubris of doctors who believed they could make children immune to all disease. The punchline—that her father's "cure" turned her into a hybrid animal rather than protecting her—suggests such medical interventionism produces monsters rather than health. The poem is attributed to Edmund V. Cooke and published in the *Journal of Osteopathy*, indicating contemporary medical skepticism about trendy treatments.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A Serum-Comic Tragedy She was a doctor's child, and he Embraced the opportunity From all disease to make her free With absolute immunity. “And first,” said he, “as I indorse Prevention of diphtheria, This anti-toxin from a horse Should kill some bad bacteria “This vaccine virus from a cow (And I indorse it fully) Should help along, and, anyhow, “Twill make the child feel ‘ bully.” “Of snake-bite serum just a touch. We get it from a rabbit Which we have bitten up so much It really likes the habit. “Some meningitis toxin, too, Would better be injected. A guinea-pig we strain it through To get it disinfected. “Some various serums of my own I'm rather sure will answer; I make them for all troubles known, From freckles up to cancer.” Alas, alas! for all his pains, The end was scarce desirous, She soon had nothing in her veins But various kinds of virus, N heavy roads—in soft clay, mud, sand—the sturdy Vacuum Part horse, part cow, part sheep, part goat, Her laugh was half a whinny. aid he, “she’s half a shoat And badly mixed with guinea. “A girl who bleats and chews her cud Cup Tread thrusts and grips deeply below the surface, preventing loss of traction and side slipping. Not fancy patterns on artificial surfaces made for illustration, but plain proof of positive traction right on the road, left everywhere in actual service, is the safety advertisement of Pennsylvania Oilproof VACUUM CUP TIRES On the slipperiest pavements they act on the only principle by which rubber projections can grip a smooth, wet surface—suction—leaving their impressions of absolute skid prevention and riding safety. As makers of the famous Vacoum Cup Tires, we This non-skid effectiveness is guaranteed, else tires Vocwame Cao. Tires se returnable, after reasonable t fame and reputation As to quality sercice, Vacuum Cup Tires are guaranteed Elle tae ene Oilproof and—per warranty tag on every casing—for 6,000 Miles EBONY TREAD A. quality casing with . black, ribbed tread, Pennsylvania Rubber Company rp gg meand Vellow Direct factory branches and ser See thronghont the United Staten Will never make a woman; Td better get some good clean blood And make her partly human.” Edmund V. Cooke, in the Journal of Os- teopathy. ‘ou seul know > 4 | Boston > < Garter KiewGup The maximum of worth is found in the “Boston” Silk 50c Lisle 25c GEORGE FROST CO, BOSTON Suggestion for the Public F the public should ever feel that it is not getting all it is entitled to, we suggest that it start a press bureau, preferably at Washington. It is remarkable how much can be accomplished by a well-equipped, well-heeled and reasonably industrious press bureau, the object of which is to gather all the facts, rumors, allegations and suspicions that exist anywhere and interpret them in favor of that particular interest which pays its expenses; and it is indeed expensive to cover the country thoroughly. If the public is skeptical of this idea, let it consult someone who has tried it, such as the railroads, which have been maintaining the most elaborate and expensive press bureau that ever littered the multitudinous avenues of publicity with “ literature.” comicbooks.com