Life, 1916-05-18 · page 42 of 48
Life — May 18, 1916 — page 42: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two distinct pieces of humor: **Left side - "His Object":** A brief comic dialogue where a customer enters a sporting goods store demanding "half a dozen drivers" of golf clubs. The salesman assumes he means golf equipment, but the customer's insistence on "long and weighty" clubs and large quantities of various implements suggests a darker purpose—the customer appears to be acquiring weapons (drivers, brassies, etc. are golf club names, but the dialogue plays on double meanings) to commit violence, likely against the country club or golf links he mentions resenting. **Right side:** A full-page advertisement for Vafiadis cigarettes, positioned as an upscale imported product sold to royalty and military establishments worldwide. **Bottom right:** An unrelated illustration captioned "Composite Picture of One Million Wives Waiting for the Returns"—likely referencing election night, showing a wife anxiously awaiting her husband's return. The satire targets newly wealthy Americans joining country clubs and struggling with golf, portrayed as absurdly frustrated by the sport.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
His Object “YOU keep golf instruments, do you?” The stern-looking individual who A had entered the sporting-goods estab- ° ° lishment thus addressed the astute ' a ajiadis “Yes, sir; we keep golf clubs.” “Very well, sir, I want half a 't CIGARETTES dozen drivers. Se eee tae make; ate? } Purveyed fo the Household of the Khedive. the lmperial Any particular, make; ssitd Courl of Austria Hungar eye Highnoe oce Philpof Saxe Cobixg. Cotha, the imperial Court of Japan, etc. etc.. the, pricipal clubs and the regimental messes of India, Barmah and Canada e Americans who have smoked our afiadis (Vah-fee-ah-dis) Cigarettes may now oblain them in the United Slates — because to Liggett & Myers Tobacco Company, who import them.we have also iven thé sole right to manufacture them Jrom our Cairo formula. CTheodoro Vafiadis & Ca Oily skin and || li led @) Sees shiny nose How to coccect them That bug-bear of so many—an oily skin and shiny nose—has various contributory causes. Whatever the cause in your case, proper external treatment will relieve your skin of this embarrassing condition. Tonight— onight the following Wood- bury . You will feel the difference in your skin the first time nadie vit you use it. No, sir, except that they must be With warm water work up a heavy 1 long and weighty.” lather of Woadtiury #, Facial Soap ie “I'M pick you out our best. Will bit into the pores thoroughly that be all?” yu an, Newer ane ou , sir. Give me half a dozen ion. Rinse with warm nT water, then with cold—the colder the brassies, half a dozen midirons and % better. If possible, rub your face for the same number of niblicks, jiggers, a few minutes with a . we ” femmuimite mashies and putters. fees. Sd clearer te frat tne you use “For yourself, sir?” faiproverent “ Certainly.” that loveler complexion The salesman elevated his commer. looking eyebrows. “Excuse me, sir,” he ventured, “rather unusual or- der. May I inquire why you wish so many clubs of each kind?” out the United a ‘anada it “You may, sir. About a month ante, glade. fer sample For 4c we |} ago I was persuaded to join our coun- edburs's Festal Sea. try club, Since then, with the aid of Phill agen ay Or hing | a Scotch professor and a gang of Cincinnati, Ohio. villainous caddies, I have been trying paede ane to learn how to play golf. Now I'm reet, Perth going to do all I can, with these clubs, to destroy that links.” COMPOSITE PICTURE OF ONE MILLION WIVES “WAITING FOR THE RETURNS” PvE J. CARRY, PRINTER comicbooks.com