Life, 1916-02-03 · page 20 of 48
Life — February 3, 1916 — page 20: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Life* magazine contains three distinct satirical pieces: 1. **"Government By Irresolution"**: Mocking Senator Cummins's military preparedness resolution. The satire suggests American government is so ineffectual that the only way to achieve military readiness would be to wait for a foreign invasion—then respond with typical bureaucratic "blundering." 2. **"Closed Season for Kissing"**: A brief joke about public health concerns during what appears to be WWI (referenced by "the Kaiser"), suggesting kissing spreads disease and should be restricted to families only. 3. **"Not Hoover; He's Too Busy"**: *Harper's Weekly* satirically suggests Herbert Hoover as Vice President, arguing he's too occupied with wartime activities to accept the ceremonial position—a backhanded compliment implying the Vice Presidency is an idle role. The nightmare illustration depicts someone suspended precariously, likely visualizing anxieties about wartime chaos or incompetent leadership.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
200 Pastel 'HE white cloud-ships fly by, But you and I Sail on a dearer sea than the blue sky. What magic boat could be As swift and free As Love's exquisite bark upon life's sea? Government By Irresolution ENATOR CUMMINS has intro- duced a resolution into the Sen- ate among the clauses of which is the following: “The most feasible plan of acquir- ing or constructing manufacturing plants of sufficient capacity to supply the army and navy with all arms, armament and munitions of war, in- cluding ships and their equipment.” The most feasible plan we can think of at the present moment is to ask some foreign country to invade us. Then we shall find a way, after the usual amount of blundering, to accom plish the desired object. Until that is done, we shall always be governed not by resolutions, but by irresolutions. A NIGHTMARE DURING HIS NOVITIATE Closed Season for Kissing Kissing is said to be one chief cause of the alarming spread of the Not Hoover; He’s Too Busy FYARPERS WEEKLY suggests Herbert C. for Vice- President. Hoover grip.—Providence Journal. “ NTIL April kiss only in the family. Especially avoid kissing in the street- pie Mr. Hoover is a vigorous young man, very busy at present, and likely cars, whether strangers or casual friends. ITHOUT doubt — the “GONE FOR THE DAY” Kaiser. to be very busy as long as the war lasts and long after. Probably it would not suit him to be restricted to the in- activities of the first place on the Pres- idential Waiting List. Ccomicbooks.com