Life — February 3, 1916 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

198 A Valentine H, Valentine, sweet Valentine, The idol of my dreams, The brilliant star that brightly sl With pure and dazzling gleams, Accept this humble heart of mine As meek as any dove; Just let me be your Valentine And serve you, dear, with love. Harold and His Pa AY, father, what is it that we are afraid of?” said Harold, looking up from his Current Events paper. Harold's mother had gone out a few moments before, yet his father, possi- bly by long habit, first glanced at the door as he replied: “Never use that word fear in my presence, boy. We are afraid of noth- ing.’ “But, father, any foreign nation could come over and land troops and invade us and kill everybody and burn up New York and make us all slaves ; and this could all be done in seventeen hours. That's what General—" “One moment, Harold. Let us be calm. There is a measure of truth in what you say, but we must not lose our sense of proportion. We must think scientifically, It is fortunate for both of us, but particularly for you, Harold, that your father is a scientific thinker —accustomed by long training and ex perience to arrive at absolutely logical conclusions. Listen carefully, ther fore, that I may forever set your young mind at rest on this vital question of our country’s preparedness.” Harold's delight at this state could scarcely be controlled. “Oh, father!" he exclaimed, “I don't know how I should get on so well at school if it were not for your wonderful knowledge. When are the Germans coming? and can we get ready in time? and why haven't we an my and navy? and—” Control yourself, Harold, and I will explain. Give me your entire attention, because this is a question that lies at the root of our country’s grand democ- racy. By it, as Abraham Lincoln or Shakespeare said, we shall rise or fall. Are you ready?” “Tam, father. THE MIGHTY HUNTER Crown Prince: BUT, FATHER, I THOUGHT IT WAS LIONS AND BEARS YOU WERE AFTER “Necording to reliable statistics compiled by Congressman Mudgard from Hoso, N.C, we have a navy equal to any two others in the world, con- sisting of one hundred battleships of the first magnitude, one hundred of the second, one hundred of the third, battle- cruisers, dreadnaughts, | submarines, aeroplanes, gunboats and flotillas of all sorts, fully equipped with compasses, royal topmasts, steam whistles, gauges, three speeds forward and_ reverse, smokestacks, halliards and two siege guns mounted on solid mahogany. Also our army consists of two million men of the first line, and militia from every state, including nearly three thousand high-school graduates, two thousand college graduates, eighteen hundred as- sorted farmers, fully equipped with mortar-boards, portable bridges, lunch baskets, minimum rifles, Smith & Wes- son shotguns, besides other cannon, tents and sleeping-bags. But, on the other hand, according to Major-General Totem Totem of the Grand Army Bri- gade, Long Island is entirely unde- fended. Beginning with a point inter- secting the South Shore hot-dog res- taurant, and running in a leisurely di- rection south-south-east past Hemp- stead and Sheepshead Bay, and thence through Quogue and Williamsburgh to Point Judith, there is nothing to intercept the vision of a pauper nation of Europe, which, even now, gaunt comicbooks.com