Life — December 30, 1915 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

i a lo Harold and His Pa what is Mr. PA,” said Harold, “ Ford trying to do? Harold’s father raised his eyes from one of Arthur Brisbane’s editorial ad- vertisements of the theatre. “My boy,” he said, “there are some things too obscure for your immature mind. Now, if you will only ask me ahout Plato or Goethe or the Koran or the fourth dimension——” This pleased Harold greatly. “Tam so glad, father,” he said, “that you don’t understand, because I can explain it all to you, and this is the first time in my life, isn’t it, that I could tell you anything?” “Well?” “Mr. Ford is tired of having Mr. Wilson sitting down and doing noth- ing, and taking insults from Germany, and having Americans blown up, and watchful waiting, and he is going to stop the war in Europe by threatening to make them all ride in Ford cars over there, in case they don’t quit right off. That's the latest Ford joke. I know a lot more, and——"” “One moment, Harold. You mustn't he frivolous about this very serious matter. Mr. Ford is a noble man, fired with patriotism, and burning with a sense of humanity—" “ But so are we burning, father. We have money to burn, and we are burn- ing also. Germany has been burning us and—” Harold’s father put down his paper and looked at his son severely. “What's the matter with you this morning?” he said. ‘ou seem to be saturated with a kind of comic sup- plement atmosphere. Be reverent, my son; be reverent. Such levity in a young boy is most unbecoming.” “That isn’t being irreverent, father, That's only hysterics.” “ Hysterics?” “Yes; you see, that’s where you land after you have been as serious as you can be. I know, because I am just be- ginning to study psychology, and that tells how the mind works. And the teacher said that after you had been thinking about the war, and thinking and thinking, you bound to the other end of your emotions, and you laugh and don’t care, and just get funny and hysterical—sort of silly. That's what's the matter with me, because I’m nor- mal—so the teacher says—and Mr. Ford has made me hysterical. His peace-ship makes me laugh; I don’t quite know why—psychology just makes me do it, too.’ “And that’s why so many people are laughing about Mr. Ford, is it? Well, well. I'm glad to know. “Yes, father; you see, there are a lot of normal people everywhere, and —well, they remain normal, in spite of everything, I guess.” Harold’s father’s face, which had been solemn, now began to relax. Then they both looked at each other silently for a moment—and smiled together. Then Harold’s father said: “It is kind of funny, isn’t it?” + EuLison, MooveR>. A Look Ahead 'AITHFUL readers of the Tribune now see our President's finish on an island somewhere in company with William, Constantine, Ferdinand, and Admiral Von Tirpitz. They pay our President the compli- ment of forecasting that in paper games between these _ to-be-retired statesmen, final possession of the blue chips will lie between him and Fer- dinand. A Sure Thing “I ASK you, sir, would you take your daughter to see a play like that?” “And I answer you, sir: No; the chances are nine to one that she has already seen it.” E RY bachelor should change his quarters for a better half. AT THE ROCKEFELLER INSTITUTE Famous Vivisector: yes, THAT'S MY SUBMARINE DOG. 1 CAN FILL HIM WITH TORPEDO MICROBES AND SINK A WHOLE FLEET OF DREADNOUGHTS comicbooks.com