Life, 1915-12-23 · page 14 of 40
Life — December 23, 1915 — page 14: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**"All in a Day's Work"** depicts a military/industrial official orchestrating war preparations: directing newspapers to publish propaganda about ammunition shortages, instructing a "war-scare department," and planning to deliver a patriotic dinner toast. The satire targets how government manufactures public anxiety to justify military spending and defense budgets. **"For a Nice Old-Fashioned Girl"** shows a cherubic figure holding a massive heart-shaped balloon—likely satirizing sentimentality or romantic excess. **"The Great I Am"** is a personification poem from the perspective of a railroad grade-crossing, expressing satisfaction with its humble but essential role. **"The Disadvantage of Having a German Governess"** cartoon shows a governess with children, captioned with dialogue suggesting cultural/national tension—likely reflecting anti-German sentiment during or after World War I.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
‘LDF E FOR A NICE OLD-FASHIONED GIRL The Great | Am AM the grade-crossing. I spend my time spanning rail- road tracks. I am patience personified. Sometimes I wait for years for one small victim. But I wait with the consciousness of power, for the law is on my side and many men believe in me. Their trust makes my harvest sure. I am the grade-crossing, and I laugh raucously to myself as I listen in the dim watches of the night to the tinkle of bells on the cross bars. It pleases me to hear the wanton sound, Many times they have tolled, but tolled too soon. They should wait. I love the distant shriek of the locomotive, I love the whirring sound of the wheels, and I love the gay and careless laugh of the pleasant-voiced children as they chatter to the chauffeur. I love the chauffeur because he dares me. He tries to circumvent me, and succeeds nine times out of ten. I love him for the tenth time, and as I brood and meditate between funerals I rejoice that I am a grade- crossing. I croon to myself the song of the Shining Rail and the Dashing Train, and I am satisfied, for even though I occupy a humble sphere, and the great human crowd passes me by indifferently, yet I, too, do my work in the world, and Death delights to do me honor. All in a Day's Work THE head of the great armament and ammunition works, sitting in his private office, summoned to his side his private secretary and said: “Has our secret committee been sent to Washington to confér with Congress about the need of having us supply the government with ample means of defense?” “Yes, Sire.” “Have you instructed the newspapers I control to pub- lish editorials calling attention to the fact that we need a couple of hundred million dollars worth of shells at once?” “Yes, Sire.” “Have you notified our war-scare department that they must get a move on?” “Yes, Sire.” “Then send word to the chairman of the Speakers’ Committee of the dinner which I am to attend to-night, that I will respond to the toast, ‘Peace on earth, good will to men.” WOMEN without men are grease without wicks. Men without women are wicks without tallow. To get light out of men and women you must combine @ wnooes THE DISADVANTAGE OF HAVING A GERMAN GOVERNESS “SIBYL, I AM DISGUSTING WITH You.” “ BOBBIE, 1 AM ASHAMED OF YOURSELF.”