Life, 1915-12-02 · page 55 of 100
Life — December 2, 1915 — page 55: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple satirical vignettes typical of early 20th-century Life magazine humor: **Top cartoon**: Mrs. Burglar O'Toole leaves her husband to finish Christmas shoplifting—satire on petty crime and holiday consumerism. **"Archives of the Fatherland" section**: Mocks German militarism and nationalism by parodying the Declaration of Independence, replacing "life, liberty, pursuit of happiness" with "strife, monarchy, and pursuit of the Russians"—likely referencing pre-WWI German expansionism. **Animal cartoon**: Rabbit and Mouse discuss a pigeon unable to be kissed under mistletoe due to her height—simple slapstick about holiday romance. **"Her System"**: Satirizes women in political power (likely post-suffrage), suggesting female government officials mismanage national finances by "charging everything" like housewives, expecting husbands to pay bills. This reflects contemporary anxieties about women's competence in governance. The page uses humor to express skepticism about social change and foreign threats common to the era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Christmas Life Mrs. Burglar O’Toole: TAK® GOOD CARE OF THE KIDS, MIKE, I HOPE TO FINISH MY CHRISTMAS SHOP-LIFTING THIS MORNING. Unearthed in the Archives of the Fatherland E hold these truths to be self-evident; that all Ger- mans are created unequalled; that they have per- mitted their Creator to endow them with certain inalien- able rights; that among these are strife, monarchy, and the pursuit of the Russians. Mr, Rabbit: MOTION ? Mr, Mouse: COMMOTION? WHY, THERE'S THAT PRETTY MISS POUTER PIGEON STANDING DIRECTLY UNDER THE MISTLE- TOE WAITING TO BE KISSED AND NOT ONE OF THE BOYS CAN REACH HER LIPS, GREAT HEAVENS! WHAT'S ALL THIS CoM- 1083 Success UCCESS is what is left over after we have made it possible to appear to be able to get along without the help of any one else. Success is the measure of the envy which we are able to excite in others. It is the difference between what we are and what others think we are. Success is made up of equal parts of good luck, hard work, natural ability and failure. Nothing recedes like success. Success is an illusion. It appears to depend upon our- selves, but in reality depends upon our relation to others. Robinson Crusoe was a success to his man Friday. He was a failure to those who thought him lost. Fifth Avenue is a success to Sixth Avenue. Third Avenue is a success to Hester Street. Failure is often success overtrained. Success is overtrained failure. Success depends upon publicity. No man ever succeeds in a cave. A success without advertising is like making an after-dinner speech in the Desert of Sahara. When a man says, “I am successful,” he means, “Other people think T am successful.” IF WISHES WERE LEGS THEIR CHRISTMAS STOCKINGS Her System HE women having come into power, it is discovered that the country has become unexpectedly insolvent. “How does it happen that we have piled up such a tremendous national and international debt?" asks the chairman of the investigating committee. “Why,” defiantly explains the secretaryess of the treas- ury, “I ran my department just as I ran my home. I have had everything charged. As to paying the bills, my hus- band always attended to that at home, and I don’t under- stand why he has neglected them here.” JF a man has principles, he is an enthusiast; if his prin- ciples have him, he is a fanatic. comicbooks.com