Life — November 25, 1915 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

994 The Worst About the Army UR friends who are interested in in- crease of armament may find a greater profit just now in reading criticisms of that policy than argu- ments in support of it. The increase seems to be on the way. Something will be done, but what it will be, and how it is done, will make a great difference. We don’t want to waste a lot of money on foolishness. For every dol- lar we spend we want real value in protection and military training. It will not be easy to do the thing right. We don’t want a pork-barrel army nor a pork-barrel navy. A considerable ele- ment in Congress will want to give us both. It will work to contrive all man- ner of local profits from national mili- tary expenditures. It will try to play favorites. But what we want is the best army and reserve for the least money, and there are men in the Ad- ministration and in Congress, too, who will try to get it for us. Bro. O.G, Villard’s bi-weekly articles that have been appearing in the Even- ing Post are not favorable to expan- sion of the army at all, but in suggest- ing what the new army ought not to be they have some value. Bro. Villard dislikes all the utensils of violence, nevertheless he professes to be German enough to wish that if we must have them we may have them of good qual- ity and get wholesale rates. At this writing he has produced three pieces, one to show that the training of any more men for what he calls “the un- holy profession of arms” is unneces- sary and foolish; one to show that our present army is lazy, luxurious and absurd; and one to expound the “double blunder” of President Wil- son and Mr. Garrison in having “thrown away an almost Heaven-sent opportunity to reform and overhaul the whole military establishment” before getting any more. Too bad about the loss of the Heaven-sent opportunity! The last one lost of the kind was when the Presi- dent delayed about six months after notice from Bro. Villard to send a note to England about shipping matters. “ SHARPFANG, I WISH YOU'D SPEAK TO THAT CHILD. HE'S ALWAYS FRIGHTENING THE ANIMALS” Some of Bro, Villard’s criticisms of the army are shallow, some are im- pudent, but some are pretty well found- ed. It may make you mad to read them, but never mind. With a reor- ganization of the army impending there is a profit for us in knowing the worst about it, and there is no one more likely to give us the worst about the army than Bro, Villard. Armies may go out of style before we get ours home from the tailor. Let us hope they will. But we can’t wait for that. Our government must baste together a proper military garment for us next session of Congress. We are too naked now for decency. - Questions That Ought to Be Answered Wwe is the most hysterical woman in the United States? The most extravagant? The most unreliable? The homeliest? What woman, if the worst came to the worst, would make the best Presi- dent? The West newspaper proprietor? Who is our best dressed woman? Our best self-advertiser? Our most beautiful? comicbooks.com