Life — October 7, 1915 — page 38: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

EGYPTIé cabeatany vy “ Your honor,” said the arrested chauf- feur, “I tried to warn the man, but the hgrn would not work.” “Then why did you not slacken speed rather than run him down?” A light seemed to dawn upon the pris- oner. “That's one on me. I never thought of that.”"—Case and Comment Making Things Even “ Here's a young man that predicts that movie shows will eventually bring five dollars a seat.” “Well, things have a way of evening up. I suppose then we can see grand opera for a nickel.” —Philadelphia Bulletin, Sliced Orangca with a dash of Abbott's Bitters are appetizi Sample of bitters by mall, 25 cts, in stamps. . Baltimore, Md. An Unavoidable Disappointment. Brudder Johnson was a pompous negro who took an active part in church work. Whose Head? Some men are born bores, some ac- One night the preacher said: “ Brudder a quire turgidity by constant practice and Johnson, will you lead us in prayah?" _A teacher was giving a lesson on the others tell Ford stories—Kansas City “Ah’m sorry to disappoint de Lawd circulation of the blood. Tr ying to make Stor, to-night, pahson,” replied Brudder John- the matter clearer, he said: “Now, boys, son, “but Ah has a cold on mah ches! LET socd on SY head the Moot, ae — ae H rournal. know, would run into it, an shoul atiets Home 2 turn red in the face.” RAYMOND- WHITCOMB CRUISES “Yes, sir,” said the boys. * continued the teacher, “ what TO THE I want to know is this: How is it that West Indies, Panama, the Central Ameri- while I am standing upright in the ordi- can Wonderland and the Spanish Main nary position the blood doesn’t rush into my feet?” Tropical Cruises de Luxe of twenty-four days’ ‘And a little fellow shouted: “ Why, duration sailing from New York Jan. 29, sir, because yer feet ain't empty.” Feb. 12 and March 11, by the beautiful —Herald of Osteopathy. American sisterships “PASTORES and TENADORES” BACARDI Mokes ‘The Perfect under the American Flag Cocktuil, Rickey or Highball, Try Itt Remarkable and comprehensive tours to . . SOUTH AMERICA His by Right January 15th, February 2nd, Sth, 16th and 26th, 1916 An Irish chauffeur in San Francisco, ‘Weekly Tours to California on Youare not particularly interested in the kind of gloves your great- who had been having trouble with nu- the Highest Plane of Travel merous small boys in the neighborhood Send for Booklet desired of his stand, discovered one day on ex- RAYMOND & WHITCOMB COMPANY amining his car that there was a dead 17 Temple Place, Boston You are interested in getting cat on one of the seats. In his anger he New York Chicago Philadelphia San Francisco your money’s worth in was about to throw the carcass into the glovewear now. street, when he espied a policeman. NO JOKE TO BE DEAF Holding up the carcass, he exclaimed : EVERY DEAF PERSON KNOWS THAT. But if John Fownes had not “This is how I am insulted. What am 1 make mysett hear after being deal for 25 vears, with, these i y I to do with it?” Anigcll Ear Drems, I wear then satisfied your great - grand- day and eight, They are perfec . “Well, don't v2? Take it confortable. Noose secs them father and other particular Well, idonit iyou. knows: “Take: 3 Sum oe aad Twa enyere cos . ight be straight to headquarters, and if it is not sy. bae-4 gt deal oad bow Cake. persons,—we might not claimed within a month it becomes your | Bj tacit hear, “Address Mesireteg Par Ore able to make you such good property."—Harper's Magazine. | GEO. P, WAY, Artificial Ear Dewy Cot gloves today. | b ile 8t., Detroit, Mich. LET ME SEND YOU PHOTOGRAPHS OF A Dil themandard-which we have | Wire: Hear, yor ratty mot swe =, «60 SY OUR FARM followed—and improved,— | the landlord come and see for himself IN THE BEAUTIFUL BERKSHIRES since 1777. the damage the rain did to our ceiling. MSc cited ee tee ae eI aE Huw: T can't without letting him see FS ge ken ere peg tpl emp ies | the damage the children have dene to the Se ite Tose etre a a ee a | rest of the house—Boston Transcript. Se ced &F, ROGERS, Lee, Berkshire Co. Mass. comicbooks.com grandfather wore.