Life, 1915-06-10 · page 15 of 48
Life — June 10, 1915 — page 15: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This piece satirizes the commercialization of literature and formulaic novel-writing in early 20th-century America. A Japanese character writes to *Life*'s editor, reporting advice from a publisher: insert "Love and Ladies" into any story to guarantee sales, since men will buy anything about women. The satire mocks both publishers' cynicism and writers' willingness to produce sentimental drivel for profit. The accompanying mock-novel excerpt—"The Dentist's Daughter"—deliberately demonstrates this formula's absurdity with overwrought melodrama, broken English, and ridiculous plot turns (a woman attacks a man with bricks to get him to dental work; he dies of shock). The "Japanese school-boy" framing device, common in *Life*, allows the author to critique American literary standards through an outsider's bemused perspective, highlighting how transparently mercenary the publishing industry had become.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Te ae Letters of a Japanese School-boy To Editor “ Life Comic Section” who have no reverence for Macmillan or any other sacred books, EAR SIR:— In hardness of money-manufac- turing now days considerable business men has took up literature for profit because this form of dishonesty cannot be punished by jails. Arthur Kicka- hajama, missionary boy, say with en- thusiasm peculiar to Christians, “Togo, you should write scenario for emotion picture show. Last spring I wrote one so charming it was stolen by six companies, so I can see my art any night price toc, which are pretty cheap for pride.” “How much can be obtained for emotion picture scenario, when you get paid maybe?” are smart question for me. “50$,” he divludge commercially. “T am too pure to commit crimes for so$,” I derange. “Therefore I shall took up novels for business, be- cause Hon. Robt W. Chambers are very high pay stenography, thank you.” Therefore I go to library and read 1000 books to include all latest novels of London (England) and London (Jack). I find these books considerable gunfire, tea-drunk, dis- gust, refinement, passion, disease, words, jalousy, palaces and kitchen sinks, In those novels I could learn everything about life including several things which are not there. But one thing I could not assimilate in my intelligence. How do you write novels when you do not know how? Thusly enjoying confusion I sent quicktime letter to Important Publisher who wrote backwards following wis- dom: “All authors wishing to make high wealth must write about ‘Love and Ladies. Whyfor? Because. Gentle- men think only about ladies and ladies think only about themselves. By in- serting love into this diagram every- A Plot for a Novel become suddenly in flames like Shakespeare and wrote fol- lowing novel” body become sifficiently emotional to pay 1%4$ to booksale.” With that recipe in memory I be- come suddenly in flames like Shake- speare and wrote following novel which you can supply with words if dissatisfied : THE DENTIST’S DAUGHTER. Chapt I Dorothy Deadwary were daughter of dental Dr of same name. She so beautiful that she do not seem real, which make her very nice hero for fic- tion. Among her face she got teeth so polished she make delight while smiling. One a. m. Hon. Father ap- proach to her say, “Dorothy, go to sidewalk befront of my office and make smiles so my toothpullery & fillery be advertised.” “Father, I love you to my last tooth,” she report while going. Chapt IT Befront of dental office she stand showing teeth by smiles while holding adv sign which say “Dr Deadwary pulls these inside.” tor refined & beautiful young men observe those teeth and go inside get new set so they look more Howard Chandler Chesty. Considerable of them propose marry her, but she too busy for loving thought. Pretty soonly youngly man of Jack Barrymore eyebrows make passby. Ah! Love arrive with con- siderable kick-up of heart. Yet he would not observe her, He too in- dustrious thinking up soap business which he owns. How shall she chase him and tell him love? Chapt IIT “If I get him to dental parlor I can propose while he helplus!” Thusly she think. But how do it? So hal Next day she put on uniform of suf- frage including brickbats. When she seen that youngly man she yall “ Vote for ladies!" & slug him to tooth with brick, expecting he get teethache from that. He fell. She leanto. “ North- bert, I love you,” she whasper. In vainly. He dead. Chapt IV He was not, He faint away from frights. While he was making come- back lady of minus beauty approach up. “ How dare you tack my husband with bricks?” she ask peevly. “Because I love him,” narrate her. “How you get around that fact?” require Hon, Lady pulling marriage license from shoe. “Love will find a way,” corrode Dorothy Deadwary with expression peculiar to poisoned drugstore. She walk away into next chapter. Chapt V O surely yes! Next day Dorothy observe that hansom hero make walk- in to dentistry office for fix toothache. While Northbert Keenewaring (for that name is him) were in wait-room Hon. Dorothy strangulate father with laughter gas and hide him under sofa, She go to door with famus smile, “I dentist,” she say. (In