Life, 1915-06-03 · page 12 of 52
Life — June 3, 1915 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three distinct sections of satirical commentary on early 20th-century social life: 1. **"Some of the Things You Think About Your Best Girl"** - A humorous list of contradictory thoughts men have about their romantic interests, accompanied by an illustration of a woman juggling children, satirizing the domestic expectations placed on women. 2. **"Overheard at a Dance"** - A dialogue mocking the superficiality of social dancing culture, where a woman's father gives her an expensive coat, yet she complains about fashion and questions Billy Sunday's attendance—likely referencing the famous evangelist. 3. **"To a June Bride"** and **"Modern Warfare"** - Cynical advice columns satirizing marriage expectations and what appears to be WWI-era military conduct, with the latter depicting soldiers discussing conquered territories and enslaved populations. The overall tone criticizes social hypocrisy, gender dynamics, and war's brutality.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Some of the Things Vou Think At Times About Best Girl. compared with her, any looks like a two-family Your HAT, angel laundress. That you can if you have to. That you long to rescue her from a lurning aeroplane. That she is just all right without her family. That you wish she had resisted that kiss a little more. That you wish she hadn't. That you never saw her look better. That you never saw her look worse That you would break off the en- gagement with half a chance. That heaven and earth, fire, water, battle, murder and sudden death vt along without her couldn't make you part with her. “WOMAN'S WORK IS NEVER DONE” Overheard at a Dance “DYON'T you love to watch them? I never get tired of it. They say it’s such good exercise—yes, it really is! But so few men lead well—isn’t she splendid! Her father gives her ten thousand a year just to dress on. No, they never used to cut in; I rather like the idea, don’t you? Isn't it funny how used we get to it? I remember it was only two or three years ago when there was so much talk about it in the papers—now everybody dances. Does Billy Sunday object? How funnee!” YOUTH WILL HAVE ITS FLING To a June Bride E glad that he has some enemies. If all the world were unanimous in loving him as much as you do, then you would scarcely have a monopoly, And what is real love without a monopoly? Don't take his money as if you were accepting a favor, but as if you were according to him a rare privilege. Pre- cedents are everything, Begin to talk about your clothes gradually. Remember that when a man has to listen to them for thirty or forty years, it is only common justice to him that he should he broken in like a young colt. Treat his parents as if you were now one of their family and not as if they were now one of yours. Always tell him the truth—about everything but your own affairs and everyone but yourself. In case, by any mishap, you should happen to come within your allowance the first month, do not be dis- couraged, Rome wasn’t built in a month. Modern Warfare “Al TION, generals! enemy “We have, sire.” “And burned all the sacred places, violated the innocent women, killed and shot the other non-combatants?” “We have, sire.” “Have you taken the rest of the populace living and ordered them sent to our own land as slaves?” “We have, sire. Then we will offer a prayer of thanksgiving to Al- mighty God and distribute the Iron Crosses.” Have you suffocated the comicbooks.com