Life — May 13, 1915 — page 45: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Si lk) ial ag They Are Still With Us NCE there was Chaos, And out of Chaos there came a group of Nebulx. “Tt is the future we are looking to,” said the Nebulz. “At present we amount to nothing. We are of no more consequence than a razor-back hog in a synagogue. But—we must develop, progress, as it were, become people, and inhabit a world.” Then the Nebulx considered some more and made the following pro- found announcement: “There can be no ultimate unity without a struggle. Competition is the life of Destiny. We will, therefore, divide ourselves into two groups, each opposed to the other.” This resolution having been adopted without a dissenting voice, just as if the meeting were presided over by cither Roosevelt or Barnes, it remained to select the names of the two classes of people, and it was unanimously decided to call them the Never-readys and the Ever-readys, “But they do sound so dreadfully alike,” said a female Nebulus, after the resolution had been passed and it was too late to do anything about it. “Don’t you think they should be changed, so you will know them apart?” At this an old gray-headed Nebulus who, if he had been alive and on the job, would have had a lot of experi- ence, replied testily: i “We will be able to tell 'em, never % sibeee your garageman recommend HAV> Harry: “Cenainly! And it's approved by 275 out of 300 leading automobile manufacturers, tn the end it costs Jess than many inferior oils, gives you greater mileage, less carbon and longer service from your engine.’ Fer sale by all garages and general stores selling aut supe ‘Mies, tn the fameus blumand-white can with the inner seal IF YOu ARE HARD TO FIT a ky TOUT FIGURES JORESSUS SUITS WAISTS. SKIRTS. UNDERWEAR @ MAMUFACTURERS PRICES ‘Tne rs LaneBryant Nee vert | “This is the non-skid tire” “‘The Republic Staggard Tread was origi- nated at a time when there wasn’t a single effective non-skid tread on the market. “So the Repyblic inventors didn’t imitate, didn’t attempt to construct something ‘just as good.” They studied road surfaces, analyzed skidding dangers, and designed along scientific principles a tread capable of filling every requirement. “For seven years thousands of experienced motor- ists have been putting it to test on slippery city pavements and hard gritty country roads. That U.S. PATENT OFF, fear. The Never-readys not only keep everybody waiting for them, but if you even mildly expostulate, are so hurt because jou don’t understand why they were not there, that you spend the rest of the time in which there is still a possibility of enjoying yourself, in apologizing for being so rude as to suggest that they haven't a perfect right to make others suffer on their account, On the other hand, and to wit, the Ever-readys, who are vastly original effective Serine 1914, epubite hbber Co Youngstown, O. they believe it to be the Supreme Tire Value is proved by their continuous use of nothing but Republics. “*From the standpoint of econor 100, Republic Tires will win your decisio They cost more to buy than many, because there's more real ality in them—but they cost less to use than any, because you get more uninterrupted mileage out of them, Write for ‘‘Old Man Mileage—His Book,”’ which contains facts of vital interest to every tire buyer. The Republic Rubber Co., Youngstown, Ohio Branches and Agencies in the Principat Republic Staggerd Tread, Pat. Sept. 415-22, 1908. in the minority, are always ahead of time and bear the burdens of the others merely because they are equipped with a sense of honor caus- ing them to be eternally miserable.” They were, however, not allowed to proceed any further, as at this moment the chairman bunched himself to- gether and declared: “Tt is so disordered,” after which the mecting adjourned to meet at a date to be set by the main contractor. comicbooks.com