Life — November 26, 1914 — page 36: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

960 fe) CONTEMPORARIES cA _ 7 — 5 5 The Aristocrat of Cigarettes The Moral of the Story The kindergarten teacher recited to jis : “ RAMESES her pupils the story of the wolf and the lamb. As she completed it she said: A= = , “Now, children, you see that the lamb | 3 k , Largest Selling 20c would not have been eaten by the wolf if : Cigarette he had been good and sensible.” : One little boy raised his hand. “Well, John,” asked the teacher, “what is it?” “Tf the lamb had been good and sensi- ble,” said the little boy, gravely, “we should have had him to eat, wouldn't we? "—New York Times. ‘A Sherbet ia made tasty and delightful by using Abbott's Hitters. Sample of bitters by mail, 2 cta. in stamps. Co., Baltimore, Md. CW. Abbott & No, Indeed! “Tt seems to me,” remarked Mrs. Wood B. Highbrow, “that those Russian Cassocks do not seem to be any match for the German Oolongs.” Of First Importan —Kansas City Star. peace The teacher was examining the class A country politician in New Jersey ——$—$$_$______——. in physiology. “Mary, you tell us,” she was elected school commissioner. One asked, “what is the function of the day he visited a school and told the 4 wihoit stomach?” teacher he desired to examine the boys “The function of the stomach,” the | and girls. (or shaving brush) , . “The OF Sate oa thee 1s come: little girl answered, “is to hold up the A spelling class was performing, so fortable. All” you need for a petticoat."—Bufalo Express, | the commissioner said he would inquire delightful, ‘soothing shave is a into the proficiency of that organization. razor and The teacher gave him a spelling-book, LLoyvo's GREAT BEAR SPRING WATER and the students lined up in front of EUX-E-SIS 5O cents the case of 6 glass stoppered bottles ihe-nightyedacsioes © Na tance wok ores mistcn beck He thumbed the book. Then, point- tobother with. Si delicate cream, Tue pen may be mightier than the ing at the first boy, he said: Thich Inctantly softens the beard, whee sword, but in Europe just now it isn’t it.” te tubes of all Dealers mightier than the censored. & slowly spelled the boy Send 1c for sample tube to Deft. A. —Times of Cuba, i Yrong,” said the commissioner, and ‘ou spell eggpit. B-R-p-i-t,” spelled the boy. “Wrong. You spell it.” The next boy spelled it the same way. and the next and the next. “Bad spellers, these,” commented the The moderate man is the backbone of this commissioner to the distressed teacher. “Why, Mr. Commissioner,” she pro country. tested, “they have all spelled eggpit correctly.” He who drinks and eats, works and plays, “They have not.” “Will you let me see the word in the intelligently, is the best citizen. book?" the teacher asked, tearfully. “I am sure they have It is for him we make WILSON—an exception- “Here it is,” said the commissioner, and he pointed to the word “ Egypt”. ally mild, mellow Whiskey—and protect it with _rinBits the Non-Refillable Bottle. : Dr. Pintes: Are you going to call a consultation? So that he is always sure to get just what he Dee natcan Cate ene ae be calls for, every time—Wilson—Real Wilson— lieve the patient has that much money That’s All! —New York Post FoR 23 CIGARS FREE CLUB RECIPES—Fres booklet of famous club recipes for mixed drinks. Address Wilson, 13 East 31st St, N.Y. That's All! -MADE AT KEY WEST comicbooks.com