Life, 1914-09-17 · page 46 of 48
Life — September 17, 1914 — page 46: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page mixes advertisements with humorous short stories typical of early 20th-century Life magazine. **The Main Story** ("God Save the Barnyard!") satirizes bureaucratic overregulation. It discusses milk certification requirements mandating tuberculin testing of dairy cows. The author quotes a Pennsylvania farmer who refuses these tests, arguing they harm cow health and questioning whether cows suffer "anaphylaxis" (allergic shock) like humans. The closing line—"Those cows are more fortunate than some hospital patients"—suggests ironic social commentary: cows receive more regulatory health protection than vulnerable hospital patients do. **The Train Anecdote** (bylined T.L.M.) humorously depicts marital discord when a wife discovers a stranger (the narrator) occupied a train berth meant for her. Her husband's angry reaction contrasts with the narrator's amusement at how "sticking to principle" created chaos. The joke mocks both masculine pride and the absurdity of rigid social conventions. The page also advertises Cook's Champagne and promotes John Ames Mitchell's novel *Pandora's Box*.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Why not suggest it to your host? He’ll know that yours is the careful selection of a connoisseur. Champagne Pure—unsurpassed in flavor and del- icate fragrance of bouquet. The added price of foreign made champagnes does not go for quality—it pays ocean freight and import duty. Every penny you spend for Cook’s goes for quality. American Wine Co, ST. LOUIS struck husband turned and faced her. “You!” he cried. “What's the meaning of thi His wife laughed hysterically, “T don't know,” she half sobbed. “AILT know is that this gentleman "— pointing to me ave up his lower berth and he certainly had the upper berth, beeause | gave him the ticket myself. Then he disappeared. And what do you suppose? Another man took his place. I couldn't wait to get out of that train!” Her hushand regarded her gravely and grimly. As for myself, I was secretly delighted. It only goes to show that when a man sticks consistently to a right principle he can get even with almost anyone. “Well, if that isn’t just like a fool woman!" he exclaimed. “Do you mean to tell me—” His wife looked at him reproach- fully. The last thing I heard her say, as I moved blissfully off out of the trouble zone toward the taxi stand, was: “My dear, you just couldn't hire me to take that trip with a stranger in the upper berth.” TOL. M. God Save the Barnyard! The following is taken from the “Circular of Information Concern- ing the Requirements ‘of the Milk Commission of the Medical Society of the County of Westchester for “Certified Milk”: “4. Tne Cows.—No cows will be allowed in the herd furnishing certi- fied milk cxeept those which have» successfully passed a tuberculin test. AML must be tested, at least, once a , by a veterinarian approved by the Milk Commission.” We know a gentleman who has a herd of the finest cows in Pennsyl vania, who will not buy an animal in whose blood the consumption poison has been injected, nor permit these “tests” on his herd, He says that a cow so treated is never entirely healthy again. Also one wonders, if cows, like human beings, are not subject to anaphylaxis? —Homeopathic Recorder. HOSE cows are more fortunate than some hospital patients. Mitchell The Editor of “Life’’ wrote a novel, calling it PANDORA’S BOX He tells us that “ Pandora's Box" was written “for the pleasure of writing it. . . . To tell the story of two honest lovers was a per- petual delight.” An intimate acquaintance with the two lovers in question convinces us that the reading of “ Pandora's Box" will be as pleasure-giving as its writing. The book is fifty cents a copy, and may be obtained wherever books are sold. Where no dealer is available the publishers will supply it direct if parcel post charges are remitted with order. — Mailing weight 114 Ibs. GROSSET & DUNLAP 526 West 26th Street New York City