Life — September 3, 1914 — page 34: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Sy Possibly Tainted {AUT SCISSORS “These are evil days for the rich nen,” said George Adi t luncheon AUT NUuLLus at ie ‘Chicago Athletic. Club. “Ta rather be a pickpocket than an inter- locking director—there’s more honor in it. “They say that a cannibal king re- cently sent posthaste for his doctor. “Good gracious, man!’ the doctor said. ‘You're in a dreadful state; what have you been eating “* Nothing,’ groaned the sick man, ‘ex- cept slice of that multimillionaire whose yacht was wrecked on Cocoanut Reef.” “*Merciful powers!’ the doctor cried. “And I told you under no circumstances to eat anything rich. George, get the Postmaster-General Burleson said at a banquet in Washington : “One of our post-office stories con- cerns a post-office census taken a number of years ago. “A question in this census was, ‘What your marital relations?’ The answers to this question were startling. One post-master answered: ‘Fair to middling.’ Another answered : ne.’ A third, poor fellow, made the tragic answer: ‘The worst. —Philadelphia Bulletin. ” saws and axes. We must operate at once.’ "—Boston Advertiser. Tue-constable in a small town received i by post six “ Rogues’ Gallery” photo- u — 3 é Rein “T pec your pardon, ma'am, fer call- graphs, taken in different positions, of A . ing you to the door.” an old offender wanted for burglary in a S ? “What's the trouble?” neighboring city. A fortnight later the “Why, the lady next door told me constable sent this message to the city < you would buy a jar of our beautiful chief of police: cream because you needed it. But I see “T have arrested five of the men, and a you don't. Good day, ma‘am. am going after the sixth to-night.” Horrid Caddy: any vec wit’ Fv “Wait one moment, please. I'll take —Everybody's. CASTIN’, MISTER? one anyway."—Cleveland Plain Dealer. Lire is published every Tharstay, sim ancously In the Unite States, Great Reftain, Canada and British Lave bs for sale by all newsdealers in Great Britain and may be obtaloed from Nookselters tm all the priaciral Ponessions. $8.00 a year In advance,” Additional, postage to foreign countries inthe Postal Union, $1.04 year; cities of the world.” ‘The foreign ied trom LIPE'S London Ofer, Rolls House, reams Buildings, to Canada, 2 cente. Single current copies, 10 cents, Hack numbers, alter Ure months from date of pubticaon, London, E. 3S cute, Lemues prior to 1918 out of print. The text and Ubustrattons tm LAUR are copyrighted, For Reprint Righes tn Great Britain appy te Live, 14 Southampton Rew, London, W. No contribution til be returned unter accompanied by stamped and addressed envelope. LAV does not eid itself responsible for the toss or nancreiurn of unsolicited Contributions, Prompt notification shoutd be tent by subscribers of any change of addres Hupmobile Car of the American Family 11200 QA highly specialized, individu- alized, Hupmobilized motor car which gives you, we believe, more service and comfort for your money than you can find if you comb the market a dozen times over Hupp Motor Car Co., Detroit Price f.o.b. Detroit. In Canad. $1400 f.o.b. Windsor, Ont. ue DELIGHT There is a vast dif- serene between a mild OC al Ss degree of pleasure and a full degree of delight. The difference between the Giese -work cocktail — quite frequently palate- repelling mixture—and thesmooth, mellow, pleasurable cocktail, is embodied in every bottle ; ; of CLUB COCKT, AILS— unvarying, always the same Niacties SS choice liquors, always the same ing flavor. =" @ Measured to the drop, aged in ame Brat led of fine, matured * liquors. Have you tried the Bronx and Dubonnet varieties? G.F. HEUBLEIN & BRO. - Hartford, B, Now corks London Importers of the famous A-1 comicbooks.com