Life — August 13, 1914 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Riparian Rights and Wrongs HE Man from Mars found himself on a road which, as he looked ahead of him, seemed to lead down to the seashore. Long before he reached the water, however, he found the way obstructed by a redoubtable fence, which bore the legend: “ Private; Keep Out.” He stopped and was peer- ing through the fence at the cool, in- viting waters, when from behind one of the sand-dunes appeared a Young Fellow running, and after him a middle-aged man, sleck in appear- ance, who made threatening gestures as he ran. The Young Fellow gained the fence well in advance of his pur- suer and scaled it hurriedly at the risk of his life, whereupon the older man stopped, gazed daggers after him for a moment, and then turned back. “Isn't he the old curmudgeon, though?” exploded the Young Fellow in the direction of the Man from Mars. “I really couldn't say,” replied the Martian. “I'm a stranger in these parts. May I ask what the trouble is?” “Oh, no trouble at all,” replied the other, with breezy sarcasm, “except that the gentleman you saw chasing me has fenced off the ocean and will not allow anybody to have any benefit from it.” “Who is he? Is he some public custodian to whom the public, for rea- September 30, 1813, strotied along the main street, end I, Ull we over some good 01 watil the subject was talked Old Overholt Rye “Same for 100 years’* It's pure, mellow flavor and tare fragrance have helped to smooth over many an argument. A pledge of sincerity between friends. Aged in charred oak barrels, distilled and bottled in bond. A. OVERHOLT & CO. Pittsburgh, Pa, sons of its own, has intrusted this vast body of water and the shores there- of?” “Oh, no. He’s just Mr. Amphibious Hogg, one of our leading fiscalizers.” “But why does he fence off the ocean?" “Because he says it’s his private property; that, according to what some Indian chief said in the Sixteenth Cen- tury or thereabouts, he has the right to fence in this shore and keep every- hody else off.” “Very strange, very strange,” mused the Man from Mars. “I certainly never heard of making the sea and the seashore private property. I should think that the public would have some- thing to say about tha But even if it is his private property, why should he want to keep people out?” “Don't ask me,” said the Young Fellow. “T can understand why fences should be built on land, such as for keeping live stock out of growing crops and so on, but I should think that air and water at least should be free to all, I never heard of anything else.” “Then you must be a stranger for a fact,” declared the Young Fellow, look- ing at him narrowly. “You don't talk as if you belonged even to this frasping planet.” Ellis O. Jones. Horet Warter: Come, sir, you really must go off to bed, sir. (Yawns.) Why, the dawn’s a-breaking, sir. Late Revetter: Let it break—and put it down in the bill, waiter.—Punch. Coon: 1 SEE YOUR WIFF HAS TAKEN TO SLEEPING IN A BED Possum: YEAMA; MANGIN' AIN'T GOOD ENOUGH FOR HER THE WAY TO REDUCE WEIGHT Eat and Grow Thin is a book of advice, recipes and menus, in which all fat-making foods are avoided. At any bookstore, $1.00 net. Mailing weight, 14 oz. E. P. DUTTON & CO., Publishers, 681 Fifth Avenue, New York comicbooks.com