Life, 1914-04-23 · page 37 of 44
Life — April 23, 1914 — page 37: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page features a satirical debate between a politician named Mr. Marblehead and colleagues like Mr. Sombrero and Mr. Bygone. Marblehead argues *against* paying workers higher wages, claiming such payments cause moral decay: workers get married (disrupting peace efforts), spend extravagantly, support saloons, corrupt politics, and ultimately weaken churches and morality—a vicious cycle. The satire's targets are: - **Laissez-faire economics**: Marblehead cites Adam Smith to oppose worker assistance, a common anti-labor argument - **Political hypocrisy**: He doesn't actually consult constituents; he decides what they want through the local party newspaper - **Class contempt**: The wealthy/powerful dismiss workers' welfare improvements as inherently corrupting The joke exposes how industrialists and politicians rationalized opposing worker benefits by falsely moralizing about wages causing social collapse—revealing the self-serving logic beneath "anti-labor" rhetoric during the Progressive Era labor movement.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
friend to the working man or an enemy? . Mr. Marteneap: A friend. A very close friend. If it were not for this friendship, I should not be ad- dressing you. Now, if you will bear with me for a moment, I will trace some of the evils of this paying of indiscriminately high wages. Already the news dispatches tell us that many of these working men have been en- couraged to get marricd. This alone is a great retrogressive step. Ata time like this, when the peace movement is under such satisfactory headway, to increase marriages and thus throw open new territory to bickering, quar- relling and other disagreements of all kinds is nothing short of fatal. Mr. Sombrero: Is the gentleman speaking on the authority of the Navy League or some other authority? Mr. Marstenetap: I speak on the authority of Adam Smith Mill, a famous economist of a recent century. In the first volume of that great work, page 5,448, he lays down the indisput- able postulate that it is impossible to help human employees by doing any- thing for them. Paying more than necessary always leads to extravagance, extravagance helps the saloon-keeper, the saloon-keeper complicates politics, politics is conducive to lying, lying in- jures the decalog, injured decalogs re- quire greater expenditures for churches and ministers, and thus the vicious circle is complete. Mr. Bycone: Is there any other reason why you favor this bill? Mr. Maxnteneap: Yes. I favor it because my constituents want it. Mr. Byco: How do you find out what your constituents want? Do you ask them? Mr. Mareteneap: No. That would he too long a process. I usually talk it over with the editor of the local party organ, Then I tell my constitu- ents what they want, and that’s what they want. Mr. Cuamman: The time of the gentleman has expired, By Oe J. Kelly-Springfield) etm a dismal-looking young man who ap- Automobile Tires | & Mieetiokine Yom tad Ne To say that a thing is hand-made implies that it has been produced skilfully, the principals, asked : patiently, perfectly. Kelly-Springfield tires and tubes embody not only hand “ Are you related to the bride or to the workmanship, but the very finest rubber obtainable. That’s why they win— bridegroom-elect ? ” and wear, | No, the gloomy reply KELLY-SPRINGFIELD TIRE COMPANY Cor. B’way & 57th St., N. Y. aid the guest, “ what interest Branch offices: New York, Chicago, Philadelphia, Boston, Seattle. Atlanta, Cincinnstl, San Francisco, ave you fa the ceremony Los Angeles, Cleveland, $:. Louis, Detror Akron, 0. have you in the ceremony Bering Tie and Reber Co itocma, Tens Genmra Roler & Sepety Cos tea ot. > Wels feplted the Ross ete Core Denver, Colo. ; D. Fraske & Co.. Charleston, $C. the defeated candidate. —Ladies’ Home Journal, Co., Jacksonvitle. Fla. jianagotis, 1