Life — November 27, 1913 — page 32: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

URY FOOLISH CONTEMPO ARIES L ga The Queer Sex “T always knew women were incon- sistent, but I heard of one to-day that takes the cup-cake.” “What did she do?” “Chased her busband out of the house with a stove-lifter and then cried because he left her without kissing her good-bye.” —Boston Transcript. =" Comfort Without Extravagance, Hotel Woodstock, New York An Unfortunate Combination During revival meetings in a western city placards giving notices of the various meetings, subjects, ete. were posted in cs. One day the follow- displayed Subject—" Hel Absolute Certainty.” Thomas Jones, barytone, “Tell Mother I'll Be There.” —Ladies’ Home Journal. Tt. Location and Its will sing GREAT BEAR SPRING WATEK SO cents per case of 6 glass stoppered bottles THE TINDER BOX By Maria Thompson Daviess Author of “The Melting of Molly” A whimsical comedy, written with deli- ciously flavored sentences around the old mate-motif, from such a modern feminist viewpoint that every reader feels both charmed and challenged to the point of a personal response. Clever illustrations by John Edwin Jackson Price $1.00 net, postage 7 cents For sale everywhere. Published by THE CENTURY CO. a —— EGYPTIAN DEITIES Plain or Cork Tip Ke n Cigarettes” Clinging Gowns The two women were discussing the fashions. “Did you say that your husband was fond of those clinging gowns?" “Yes, indeed; he likes one to cling to me for about five years. —Cincinnati Enquirer, A teaspoonful of Abbott's Bitters with your Grape Fruit | makes.an ideal appetizing tonic, Sam; bitters by mail, Seta in stamps, Kebott & Ca. "Baltimore: Ma. “T map to let that new maid go. I discovered that she was neglecting the children when I was attending my club meetings.” “That so?” “Yes. Positively, she couldn't think less of them if they were her own.” —Detroit Free Press. Install a Welephone in Your Closea Car Western: Electric Chau-Phone A new convenience that makes the luxury of the limousine complete. ‘The transmitter into which you speak is as ne sa lorgnette. ‘The receiver at the chauffeur’s ear carries the message clear and distinct above the noises of traffic. ‘The Chau-phone is regular equipment on leading cars for 1914. Write us for information. WESTERN ELecTRIC Ors arse installed in any car—old or new. It can easily be Main Office: ng AO West Street, New Tok Coy Braach Houses: All principal cities. Agents everywhere Billiards | $700 at Home |DOWN Your own tgble will cost less than = Pay in pool-room. You play on it while paying. No special room Deeded, ‘Sizes of tablca up to 4y5x9 feet (otandard). BURROWES Billiard and Pool Table FREE TRIAL—NO RED TAPE. On receipt of first installment we will ship table. Play on it one week. If unsatisfactory re- turn it, and on its receipt we will refund your depos: insures you a free |. Write today for lustrated catalog ¢i E. T. BURROWES CO. 756 Ceater St. Portland, Me. Prices, $15 Up $1 or mere down. according to alae and fle, Small amount each month. | Balls coer, ete, free. She Saw Him Passing By That the aged are not easily roused to enthusiasm or excitement is well known, but they are not often as calm as the old Jady that the Windsor Magazine tells about. An old man fell from a second-story window into the street, where an anxious crowd immediately gathered to sce whether he was seriously injured. One af his daughters rushed frantically into the first-floor room, where his wife sat knitting, and cried: “Oh, mother, mother, father's fallen from the top of the house into the road! Oh, dear! Oh, dear!” “Yes, my child,” answered the old lady, placidly, looking up from her work, “T saw him pass the window.” —Youth's Companion. CADBTRV'S ENGLISH CHOCOLATES FOR CHRISTMAS W.47u8G,N.Y, Phone Bry: (comicbooxereom