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Life, 1913-09-25 · page 37 of 43

Life — September 25, 1913 — page 37: what you’re looking at

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Life — September 25, 1913 — page 37: Life, 1913-09-25

What you’re looking at

This page contains a satirical short story titled "A Happy Marriage" alongside period advertisements. The narrative presents a comedic critique of modern courtship practices. **The Story's Satire:** The protagonist, Mr. Whipley, a busy businessman, proposes an unconventional solution to courting: rather than waste time with traditional visits, he invites his girlfriend's entire family to a city hotel for an extended stay. This allows courtship to proceed "under normal conditions" while he conducts business. The humor lies in his treating romance as a business efficiency problem—quantifying time as money and eliminating "wasted motion." **The Social Critique:** The piece satirizes early-20th-century masculine values: the prioritization of business over romance, and the reduction of personal relationships to cost-benefit analysis. The father-in-law's droll response suggests disapproval of such calculating modernism, even while finding it logically sound. **Context:** Published during a period of rapid industrialization, the story mocks how businessmen applied "scientific management" principles to all life aspects, including courtship and marriage. The page is otherwise filled with period advertisements for cold cream, facial soap, and a "Sexology" guide.

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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

gibi Lie yg Massage is but one reason for using COLCATES COCD CREAM Use it for Cleanliness— to free the dust- clogged pores from impurities. UseitforComfort— to soothe and soften the skin. Use it for Charm— to relieve irritation and smooth the skin roughened by wind and weather. Colgate Quality— Ashyour dealerthe price care ol the shin sent for 4 ta stamps mate's prepirations are tt acceptable a CArest nae GU COLGATE & CO. Dept. 23, 199 Falton St. New York Maters of aguat Sip “astine, A Happy Marriage Depends largels on a knowledge of the whole truth about self and sex and their relation to life and health. This knowl- ecge does not come in- telligently of itself, nor correctly from ordinary, every-day sources. SEXOLOGY (Illustrated) by William H. Walling, A.M., M.D., imparts in a clear wholesoue. way in one volum Knowletze a ¥: Write for Other Heepies Opinuns” and Te Puritan Pub. Co. 776 Perry Bldg., Phila, Pa. to return, as there was no other train which would get me back before mid- night. Now, T am a pretty busy man. To spend five hours twice a week in order to pass thirty minutes in the presence of your charming daughter is not a paying proposition. De you follow me?” “ Perfectly.” “Very well. Now, you know the world moves. Some of the things which we do to-day wi shocked our grandparents. What I aim for is results. I believe it would be to your advantage to have me for a son-in-law, but I am too busy a man to achieve this distinction under pres- ent conditions.” “What do you propose? “I propose, however, to invite you and your family into the city and put you up at one of the best hotels for a Jong enough period, so that our court- ship may take place under normal con- ditions—where I will not be switched off from some of the business deals I am engaged in at present. Time is money. Will you accept my proposi- tion?” ould have I shall be pleased to do so, pro- vided, after looking you up, I find that you are all right in every re- spect.” ery well, sir, consider the matter closed. Good morniny THE SECOND INTERVIEW (Two Months Later) “Good morning, Mr. Whipley.” Mr. Connellton, entering young Mr. Whipley’s office, shook hands with that gentleman rather gingerly and seated himself at the desk. “You are aware,” he said drily, “that I have taken my family back to the suburbs. " Perfectly. Mr. Whipley fingered his mail some- what self-consciously, still there was a ring to his voice that showed deter- mination. His would-be father-in-law of two months back gazed at him in- tently, “You are aware of the proposition that you made to me in my office?” he said. “ Perfectly.” “Tt was, I believe, something like this: In the stress of the modern world you did not have time to take a long journey to court my daughter, and so you suggested that we should be your guests while the process was going on, thus saving a great deal of what other- wise would be lost motion. Am I cor- rect?” “You are, sir.” Well, my daughter tells me that, while you have been studiously polite, Cleanse the face thoroughly its lather int 'Sun-Tanned Skins | How to rebuild them To have a skin you can be proud of during the coming months you must remove the effects of summer exposure and restore your skin to its natural whiteness and texture. Tonight, just before retiring, wash your face with Woodbury’s Facial Soap’ and ||| warm water, using a stiff face brush or |] rough washcloth, Rinse, and rub the cake \]| of Woodbury’s itself over your face eral times. Massage into the skin the soap thus left on the face and leave it on all night. Woodbury's Facial Soap is the work of an authority | on the skin and its needs. The cleansinj en ing treatment with it gives nature just it needs to restore the natural beauty of a sun-tapned skin, Use it Dersistently for a few weeks (stop. ping if your skin should become sensitive) and you will see a marked improvement. Woodbury's Facial Soap costs 25¢ a cake. No gne hesitates at the price after their first cake Tear off the illustration of the cake shown below 1 put it in your purse as a reminder to get a \e of Woodbury’s today and try this treatment. Woodbury’s Facial Soap For sale by dealers throughout the United States and Canada Write to-day for samples we eff! eed a sam YONA K MOODBURTS Towder, Aditess. the An: drew Jergens Co., Dept. K, “DON'T SHOUT” “Theat you. lca eat po wall TS “How?” 1, some te erie MORLEY ve 0 pair in eny cars but they are invaible, I would net know | had them in, mipsel ‘only that | hear all right. The Motley Phone for the DEAF is to the ean what are to the eyes. Invinble comfortable, weightless and harmles, Anyone can adjut © it.” Over one bundred thousand sold. Write for booklet asd testimonials. THE MORLEY CO., Dept. 783, Perry Bldz., Phila. comicbooks.com