Life, 1913-08-14 · page 26 of 40
Life — August 14, 1913 — page 26: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from Life magazine presents a humorous "Coming Events" calendar for August, mixed with biting social commentary. The cartoon at bottom shows a figure dodging a ball—likely representing evasion or avoidance. The text satirizes contemporary issues: militant suffragettes and anarchists at a rifle shoot; the irony that forests no longer exist in America; Austria's Emperor Francis Joseph as a supplier of comic opera plots; and Mrs. Pankhurst's militant suffragism being classified as "athletics" rather than activism. The sharpest barbs target social hypocrisy—factory girls being sold tombstones while working in fire-traps, and Missouri's "Good Roads Days" mocking drivers already accustomed to fixing their own vehicles. Throughout, Life employs sardonic wit to critique American industrial conditions, gender politics, and political absurdities of the era (likely 1910s).
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
nT SE? Coming August 15—International Rifle Shoot, Camp Perry, Ohio, All that is needed to make the affair a glorious success is the presence of the Balkan Brothers, the Sultan of Turkey, several militant suffragettes, a few anarchists and the I. W. W. Baby Parade, Asbury Park, N. J. The parade is an important part of the campaign for babies’ rights. Many unenlightened parents still believe that the child’s place is in the home. August 16—Mardi Gras Festival and Carnival, For- esters of America, Ulmer Park, N. Y. Among the floats to lumber along in the carnival will be one bearing a genuine stick of wood. This precious curio is a relic of the days when forests actually grew in America. August 17—Barbecue of the Master Butchers’ Association, Toledo, Ohio. It is rumored that the Bulgarian army will be made an honorary member of the association. The restored flagship Niagara, leading the Perry Memorial fleet, is expected to arrive at Chicago. Which was not even on the real estate maps when the Niagara made her initial sally down the Great Lakes. National Convention of Rotarians, Buffalo, N. Y. As opposed to the Cubists, the Rotarians believe that things go ’round and ‘round. In which they are upheld by nature, Mr. Bryan and John Henry Mears. August 18—Birthday of Francis Joseph I., Em- peror of Austria, born August 18, 1830. An estimable gentleman who has furnished more plots, costumes and scenery for American comic opera than any one European monarch now extant. National Championship Tennis Tournament, Newport, R. I. Mr. Maurice McLoughlin, of Cali- fornia and Wimbledon, England, will be a pleasant entrant in the lists, About two hundred million dollars’ worth of audience is expected to attend the matches. August 19—Convention of the National Retail Monument Dealers, Boston, Mass. Special induce- ments will be offered to factory girls employed in fire-traps. Buy your tombstones now. (N. B—A fire-trap is any building recently approved by a face tory inspector.) August 20—Governor Major, of Missouri, will pro- claim the first of two State holidays to be known as “Good Roads Days,” when every able-bodied man in the State is requested to work on the public highways. Which will be no novelty to Missouri automobilists who are accustomed to change their own tires, Opening Day of the Yolo County Fair, Woodland, California. Champ Clark, Speaker of the House of Representatives, will be invited to make the opening speech. Mr. Clark, however, is still existing within the limits of his income. August 21—Twenticth Century Limited Tourna- ment of the Columbus Gun Club, Columbus, Ohio. At the earnest supplication of The Hague Peace Tribunal, only soft-nosed bullets will be employed. Meeting of the International Athletic Federation, Berlin, Germany. At this meeting the important question will be decided as to whether the activities of Mrs. Pankhurst come under the head of accidents or athletics, August 22—Opening of the Methodist Camp Meet- ing, Ocean Grove, N. J. Large amounts of religion are expected to be had by all. The bathing will also be enjoyed. THE ARTFUL DODGER