Life — June 5, 1913 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

1124 MICE E: * Sorry Sonnet Made Out of Japanese Thoughts to Rebuke California for Her Hearty Unwelcome SAC eMORA BUN, soyanara-bun! In California In the midst ef hilarious agriculture which you will find growing there in abundance Much fruit occurs. So sweet State is California Producing voluptuous grape-fruit To eat it; Also literature and navy oranges without seeds. O-kicki-jam! O-ricki-jo! California send olive to Italy, grape to France & etcetera everywheres. But what fruit she send to Japan, please? Lemons! !!! (Laughing-sign for all eagles.) Tum-tum! No-morra! Japanese Pilgrim Fathers Go California To escape religion and other persecutions. “O joyful!” Thusly they say it, “We shall go America for teach that island how to be civilized!” They make their thoughts noble; But when they arrive Los Angeles They are less so. For why? There they observe sign, “Tf Your Complexion Is Dissimilar, Go Home!!!” O snubbs!! What if Hon. Indians had treated Hon. Pilgrim 4 Fathers with such cold hands Because they did not like the way they wore their eye- brows! Would there be some Harvard College To day? Answer is NO!!! Samisen-o! Fujiyama-ho! Hon. Pres. Wilson, you are very good King for America. We admire your Hon. Photo Surrounded by Royal Family, But excuse— How you expect Japanese to vote for you in some future if you no extenuate them now? Therefore Do something at once or else act immediately, Make Hon. Jenny Bryan Gov. of California; Or if this cannot be accomplish, Why not start a war With Mexico And thusly get California thinking about something else & leave poor Japanese still there Growing potatoes? We ask to know. No answer required. Mr Editor, this poem would look nice if Mr Kipling would fix it. Maybe it will be good for International Peace which are growing annually more toothless. Hoping you are the same Yours truly, Hasniaeura Toco. (per Wallace Irwin.) Clergyman (to bride): Wit THOU LOVE, CHERISH AND OBEY —— Nervous groom: Y—YES, sIR. 'HY were you arrested?” inquired the visi For trying to keep money in circulatio: prisoner. “T don’t understand.” “Well, they call me a pickpocket.” comicbooks.com