Life, 1913-05-29 · page 37 of 44
Life — May 29, 1913 — page 37: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertising-heavy** rather than political satire. The main content is a humorous essay titled "The First Discoverer of New York" that mockingly addresses competing historical claims about who discovered New York. The piece satirizes **pretentious historiography**—the author admits not knowing who deserves credit, then provides absurdist "facts" about Native Americans and Columbus. It humorously portrays Indigenous peoples wearing ridiculous court attire (lawn-grass clothing, dental ornaments) and stereotypes them as perpetually warring, in the casual racist style typical of early 20th-century American humor magazines. The sidebar cartoon (right) titled "Cupid: Why Don't You Come In Out of the Wet?" appears unrelated—a romantic scene with unclear specific reference. The page's bulk consists of product advertisements: **ICY-HOT thermal bottles**, garbage receptacles, Cape Cod tourism, and Gibson's Rye whiskey—representative of Life's revenue model during this period (appears to be early 1900s based on design and references).
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
1093 EEE’: The First Discoverer of New York Regarding the question as to who has the right to claim the priority of dis- covery of New York, I unite with one of the ablest historians now living in stating that I do not know. Here and there throughout the work of all great historians who are frank and honest, chapter after chapter of infor- mation like this will burst forth upon the eye of the surprised and delighted reader. Society at the time of the discovery of the blank-verse Indian of America was crude, Hudson's arrival, of among older citizens soon called out those who desired his acquaintance, but he noticed that club life was not what it has since become, especially Indian club life ; He found a nation whose regular job was war and whose religion was the ever present prayer that they might eat the heart of their enemy plain. The Indian High School and Young Ladies’ Seminary captured by Columbus, as shown in the pictures of his arrival at home and his presentation to the royal pair one hundred and seventeen years before this, it id, brought a royal flush to the face of King Ferdie, who had been well brought up. This can be readily understood when we remember that the Indian wore at court 4 court plaster, a parlor lamp shade in stormy weather, made of lawn grass, or a surcingle of front teeth. They were shown also in all these paintings as graceful and beautiful in figure; but in those days, when the Pocahontas girls went barefooted till the age of cighty-nine years, kept Lent all ter and then ate a brace of middle- course, Nad TITRA AY SW iW 6m hS This Bottle Keeps Its Contents Ice-Cold For 72 Hours Or Steaming Hot 24 Hours On every outing—yachting, motoring, bunting, fishing. plenicing or traveling—take along an ICY-HOT Bottle or two filled with the hot or cold beverages you will need when preparation is impossible, ICY-HOT FE takes place of unsanitary water bottle and pitcher ideal for night use—can be hung in tilting bracket attached to wall at beside and refreshing drink obtained without leaving bed. “HOT Jars and Ice Cream Pails—Pints, 1 or 2 quarts—wide mouth. Keeps all kinds of food, stews, oysters, vegetables, etc., hot without fire— desserts and ice cream cold in sanitary glass container—without ice. No Limit To Their Usefulness Keep baby’s milk warm and sweet all night, right by the bed, ready for feeding at any time—or keep the invalid’s hot stews, broths, ete. hot—or cold drinks, cold—in the sick room, always ready to serve—without delay for tion, No chemicals, no bother, just fill bottle and cork it prepara io ICY-HOT Leather Luncheon Absolutely Sanitary Garett; __ Neck of each bottle extends over neck of Case, Jar, ‘Lumen metal caze— liquids touch only glass, Bottle Jars and ICY-HOT on bottom, Accept No Substitute No Bottle Just as Good ICY-HOT BOTTLE CO., Dept. J Cincinnati, MBS ems Underground Garbage Receiver] Wee 27 Noeeeee' NO FLIES. NOLITTER. NOOpors| | Opens with the foot: closes ttacif. Clean and sanitary. Sold direct from factory. Guaranteed. Circular free. C. H. STEPHENSON, M 46 Farear St., Lynn, Mass. Spend Your Vacation on Quaint Cape Cod Seashore, Woods and Country. Splendid fishing, yachting, bathing and golfing. Cool breezes always. Send for “‘Quaint Cape Cod.” It's free ADVERTISING BUREAU, Room 900, South Station, Boston. NEW YORK, NEW HAVEN & HARTFORD R. R. GIBSON’S RYE A WHISKEY OF TRADITIONS RADITIONAL for high quality, absolute purity, satisfying richness, velvety mellowness, T delightful fragrance —nearly 80 years the whiskey standard of the world. Every drop of Gibson's is made from selected, matured rye and sparkling spring@MAter; ripened in a fixed tem- Perature, and held in ginal wood. .We especially commend the di 1900—the finest old whiskey money can buff d from o' arerooms to order of your deald in sealed demijohns, Cupid: wuy vox’ you come 1x out oF THE wet? z ~ 1 aged men for Easter, the figure must have been affected by this irregularity of meals. Unless the Pocahontas of the present day has fallen off sadly in her carriage and beauty, to be saved from death by her, as Smith was, and feel that she therefore had a claim on him, must have given one nervous prostration, paresis and insomnia. —From “ Remarks by Bill Nye.” Copy- right by Edgar W. Nye. Republished by permission of the M. W. Hazen Co. comicbooks.com