Life, 1913-01-16 · page 36 of 40
Life — January 16, 1913 — page 36: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page primarily contains **advertisements and humorous anecdotes** rather than political cartoons. The main content includes: 1. **"John D. Lacked Gasoline"** — A brief joke about John D. Rockefeller (the richest American of the era). A barefoot girl tells him his car won't reach heaven because "you don't have enough gasoline"—a sarcastic jab at his wealth and the common perception that the ultra-rich couldn't enter heaven. 2. **"His Rising Hopes"** — An anecdote where an elderly man boasts about dowries for his daughters, the punchline implying he's marrying them off for money rather than love. 3. **Large Schlitz beer advertisement** explaining why German and English brewers use only brown bottles: dark glass protects beer from sunlight damage. This was legitimate product information, not satire. 4. **Product ads** for Kelly-Springfield tires, Adirondack foot warmers, and other goods. The page reflects early-20th-century consumer culture and contains gentle satire about wealth and social climbing, typical of Life magazine's era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
ob id Bh , —— a : | . | money and the girls won't go to their ie husbands penniless, by any means | Now, there’s Belle, twenty-five years old, one of the best girls in the world. I . 7 shall give her ten thousand dollars when Automobile Tires she marries, Then next comes Caro- a: line, wha 4 ec th -five a We talk a good deal about the mileage of Kelly-Springfield Tires. We talk it because and I shall give her twengy thous they give it—an average mileage a thousand or two greater than the average mileage of the average tire. They give it because we build it into them. And the man who marries Delia, who is forty, will have thirty thousand.” KELLY-SPRINGFIELD TIRE COMPANY, 20 Vesey Street, New York Branch oMficesin New York. Chicago, Philadelphia, Boston, St. Louls, Detroit, Cincinnati, San Francisco, The young man reflected for a mo- Hearn Tire £e22,Angeiss Cleveland, Matin ment or so and then inquired oaraneis Ciera, tore. Beat, nani Aras Bana ‘nenne Tire Go Houston, Texas. He ; kts . fifty, have you?” Savell Davis Rubber Works, Augiista ai Ga. C Co. ’ H. R. Olmstead & Son. Syracuse. N.Y. ~Harper’s Bazar. John D. Lacked Gasoline A Little Girl Tells Why He Wouldn't Get to deaven The audience which heard the Rev W. W. Bustard, John D. Rockefeller’s Cleveland pastor, address the Christian Endeavor convention was amused by a story on the richest man. “While riding in a motor car with Mr. Rockefeller recently, some miles from Cleveland,” said Doctor Bustard, “we were about to pass a little bare- foot girl plodding along through the dust when Mr. Rockefeller ordered the chauf- feur to halt the car. Then he invited her to step up on the running board and asked her where she would like to have the car stopped. The little girl said she wanted to get off at the sccond cross- roads, and asked how far we were going. “*Oh, we're going to heaven,’ Mr. Rockefeller answered. “The little girl was surprised, as many people are when he says that. Then he no use on — “*Don't you think we'll get there?’ “*No, said the little girl “And why not?! persisted Mr. Rocke- y do Brewers of cermamyand England rown Bottles? feller. “I don’t think you have enough gas- Sunlight grows the hops, but spoils the brew. Light starts decay even in pure beer. Dark oline,’ she said.” glass gives’ best protection against light. In England and Germany the brewers won’ t use light glass bottles. Ss “Beer should not be exposed to the light, especiall Mr, Jenkins was talking with a young » eopecially an Shem be boped Bight become His direct sunlight, as it will thereby be detrimentally af- Li WLIG ut cnererste sia fected, the light having an influence upon the albumin- young man, who had very little of this oids in the beer, causing the latter to become hazy,” world’s goods, the old gentleman said “Tam proud of my girls, sir, and there is nothing I would like better than to see them married to bright, smart young men, I have made considerable Adirondack Foot Warmers Are Indispensable for eo Motoring, Driving and Sitting Outdoors They Insure coziness, warmth, com- fort! Make living in the open in branded the Winter a keen enjoyment. ‘Schlitz..?” They're universally in demand. Worn by men and women over regu: lar shoes or over hose. Made of - selected sheepskin with heavy, warm $1.50 pair Xoo! inside; ten inches high. ' Si te shoe size and whether to be worn SENT PREPAID over shoes or hose. Money back if not satisfactory. Writ large 68-page Catalog of Outdoor Ovtfittings C.LEONARD & CO., 43 Main St, Saranac Lake, That M P| e M i Iwa u kee Fa mou S. i comicbooks.com —Cleveland Press. His Rising Hopes says no less a person than Philip Dreesbach, the eminent German expert and scientist in the Wahl-Henius Institute of Fermentology. We have adopted every idea, every invention that could make for the purity of Schlitz beer. Our beer was first brewed in a hut. Now our agencies dot the earth. Our output exceeds a million barrels a year. See that crown or cork is