Life — December 26, 1912 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Ee Have You a Hysterical Temperament ? If Not You Can Try One for a Short Time as a Relief from Your Present Condition—Any Kind of Vibrations to Order at a Moment's Notice Svat BAA BAA, the most exalted yogi in the world, is at present so busy that he cannot see anyone per- sonally except by special appointment. We desire to call attention, however, to the fact that anybody can communicate &® With the Baa Baa by leaving a cash de- 6 posit at the office and going into the silence. In about fifteen minutes you will begin to get vibrations. At the end of an hour you will feel like a new man—or woman—as the case may be. We have just opened up a special department for emotional and hysterical women. We make a specialty of almost all temperaments, and no matter who you are, or how you feel, we can place you in the seventh heaven of delight in almost no time. With this preliminary, we are now ready to make the most startling announcement that has ever been issued. It must be remembered that Swami Baa Baa has placed tattvic vibrations on an entirely new basis, so that you cannot only subdue anybody who doesn’t agree with you, but you can keep on eating and drinking four times as much as you ever did before; also, you can make this re- markable change in your own personality by just follow- ing a few vibratory rules. Here is a letter just received which illustrates the method of treatment: “Sweer Baa Baa: “T can’t wait to call in person and fall upon your neck and tell you what a perfectly grand and won- derful thing you have done. “Last week I was a cold, haughty, queen-like woman, sending a chill over everybody who came near me. According to the directions, I went into the silence, indulged in rhythmic breathing, gazed at a crystal ball for ten minutes, and wished myself to be gushing and hysterical. Now I am having the mos? glorious time that could be imagined. I have just been elected president of the Woman's Club—an office which I expect to hold for at least a week—and every new fad that comes along entrances me. I have left my husband, and am now looking for a first-class affinity. Besides this, I expect to be a suffragette, a follower of Nietzsche, a sociological sharp; and, in fact, everything that is intensely intellectual—all during the next month or so. “You have done this, and I am simply crazy about you. “Dotty A great many people think that the claims made by this office cannot be substantiated, because apparently they are so wonderful. In reality, they are not wonderful at all. Everything is mental. If you walk up and down Broadway, you think you see buildings and feel people. They exist only in your mind. If you doubt this, you can materialize anything you want by concentrating upon Swami Baa Baa and waiting for developments. Here is a letter just received from one of our enthusi- astic patrons: “Dear OLp Baa Baa: “T am a lady living entirely alone, with no one to love me. Having become a member of your cult, I desired to obtain a companion. I thereupon concen- trated on a toy spaniel. At the end of four hours I achieved the result desired. The most delightful little toy spaniel in the world is now my companion. Other people claim that they cannot see him, but that makes no difference to me. He is there all the same, free of charge. Yours gratefully, Please remember that we can infuse into you any kind of a temperament that you desire. If you will call at our office, we will ‘show you models of different people. Model A.—Young lady of thirty, gushing and lit- erary; talks constantly about nothing. Model B.—High-brow type, cold and austere, and equally intellectual. Speaks fourteen languages with ease. Writes literary reviews. We can make you like this one in two weeks’ time. Model C—Simperer. If at present you are a frigid and over sensible person, perhaps you would like to take a vacation for a few weeks and become like this. Model D.—Sweet young thing. Winsome, and reeking with innocence. If you are a bold, arrogant and rather masculine looking lady, perhaps you would like to change into this winsome creature—the kind that a man jumps from a ten-story building to save. We can make the change for you for only thirty dollars. Please understand that in making a change in your temperament, you can go back to what you were at any time. In fact, you can do anything you please. P. S.—In calling at this office, before entering the pri- vate consulting room, please have your astral bodies checked at the door. It makes great confusion while clients are consulting to have their astral bodies wander- ing around and interrupting the conversation. Life’s Vibration Parlors. comicbookteoml