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Life, 1912-10-31 · page 39 of 44

Life — October 31, 1912 — page 39: what you’re looking at

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Life — October 31, 1912 — page 39: Life, 1912-10-31

What you’re looking at

This page is primarily **advertising and literary content** rather than political satire. The main elements are: 1. **"Stock Report" cartoon** (top left): A brief, unclear illustration accompanying text about cotton market fluctuations—appears to be financial/economic humor. 2. **"To After-Dinner Speakers"**: A satirical list of clichéd opening lines that amateur speakers use ("As I look about me," "We are confronted by a great..."). This mocks predictable, boring speech conventions—a timeless social observation about public speaking. 3. **Daniel Low & Co. advertisement**: A large jewelry/gifts catalog featuring Christmas gift suggestions. 4. **"His Time for Retiring"**: A humorous anecdote about Bishop Dr. W.A. Quayle falling asleep at a dinner party, ending with his hostess desperately suggesting bedtime. 5. **Literary advertisement**: For Maurice Hewlett's novel *Mrs. Lancelot*. The page reflects early 20th-century concerns: etiquette anxieties, gift-giving dilemmas, and gentle humor about social fatigue—not political commentary.

📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

STOCK REPORT INTEREST HAD BECOME CENTERED ON, THE CUTTING OF A LARGE MELON WitEN A SHARP BREAK IN COTTON OVERSHADOWED ALL OPENING FEATURES, To After-Dinner Speakers If you are enthusiastic and am- hitious, why not begin in the follow- ing manner? I shall detain you ont: As I look about me— Before I begin my remarks I should like— We are confronted hy a great I had not intended this evening — The past is behind us, but the great future. The new gencration is even now—— The vital problem of the day is—— It is possible that there may be some in this audience who. It requires a grea to— T have hesitated to mention this mat- ter before, but. When we consider some of these new problems that press in upon deal of courage MRS. LANCELOT By Maurice Hewlett Author of ‘*The Forest Lovers,”* etc. KW . ‘$9 28D Hoa Boy iaie yao ag “s2431q 2195 EIIAZ pe B4001 Coltar Pins, solid 10% D8086 29 diamonds, 12 B89 Lingerie Clasp, solid 14k gold, plain, pair .75 air BA3s8 solid 10% fold Thimble 2.00 S8H6 Purse, sterling ver mesh 5. JU72 Napkin Band. eer Ling, bead edge 2.75 ind-colored Xenas card lewelers and ilversmiths Bu87 Friendsbip Circle Brooch, solid 14k gold, engine turned. 12 whole Pearls 8.00 3.50 R206 sterling 1.00 Y S514 witch Thimble, ing silver .25 Give size Wouldn’t it be wonderful to feel that a// the Christmas gifts you send would stand comparison with any that your friends will ? For rich Uncle William who “already has everything,”” for five-year-old Mar- jorie who will rejoice over anything you give, and for all between, the one gift that will just fit is within the covers of our YEAR BOOK and within your means. Thousands of people of wealth and re- finement send every fall for our YEAR BOOK because they depend upon it to solve the very same Christmas gift problems which are puzzling you. Write today for this free 230- page YEAR BOOK. Asits helpfulness dawns upon you, you will exclaim, ‘Why didn't L learn of this years ago?” Asa trial, order one of the articles shown here. We deliver free, dainti packed, and refund money if unsatisfactor S51 smal 15 Larce tery 3178 o. 3 bottles, sterling stand, $ in, bigh 3.00 Lined, Pi !ogs, 13 pieces 12.00 Our Year Book shows a complete line of Par- {sian Ivory with and without cases His Time for Retiring Dr. Quayle Dr. W. A. Methodist Church Quayle, in the carly days of his bishop ! nd a popular lecture his droopin restlessly inistry, wen posit 50 gentlemas eyelids, his chair ‘S57 sbattie, 24 in. long, metliog silver 50 $6092 Match Box, ster fing, heavy, etched, id lined 3.00 1680 Knife, ster ling. 3 blades and B02 Black seal case for ening Ties and Glores 2.25 203 Essex Street Salem, Mass. wned politely and rubbed His host moved His hostess eyed the timepiece with growing alarm. The A frank and fascinating chronicle of the love of three men for the beautiful Mrs. Lancelot. ofelfincharm. Which did she love—husband, statesman friend, poct lover? An exquisitely wrought tale—Hewlett at his best. hack to preach one Sunday to a former very air was drowsy, but no one seemed congregation in Kansas, and was enter- able to end the tained by one of his o After the evening ser the gathered round the id reminiscences with th net, postage 13 cents ly without any thought of THE CENTURY co. ae o'clock came midnight conversation 1s doand all wkward situation. parishioners family hanged kk chimed half-past his hostess asked depreciat- ingly, but with a note of desperation in one o'clock Unusual illustrations Price 81. st. apparent retiring “ Brother Quayle, when do you go to bed?” “When I get a chance,” replied Dr. Quayle meekly. — Star showed unmistakable signs of weariness, 25 comicbooks.com