Life, 1912-10-31 · page 16 of 44
Life — October 31, 1912 — page 16: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is political satire mocking the 1912 presidential race. Life magazine humorously proposes Dr. Frederick Cook (the controversial Arctic explorer) and Commodore Robert Peary (his rival) as presidential candidates—a joke because both explorers had disputed claims to discovering the North Pole, making them symbols of fraudulence and self-promotion. The satire targets: - **Corporate influence**: Major trusts (Standard Oil, Steel, Tobacco) fund the campaign, exposing how money controls politics - **Empty political promises**: Cook's acceptance speech promises absurdities (abolishing the Supreme Court, free meals, declaring wars) to show politicians will promise anything - **Moral corruption**: Both candidates reluctantly accept only after being bribed with cash, then deny taking money—satirizing political hypocrisy The joke is that these two discredited, self-serving men perfectly represent American politics as Life saw it: corrupted by corporate money and populated by con artists making impossible promises to voters.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
“LIFE’s Cook and Peary Consent! Life's Presidential Ticket Now in CANDIDATES the Field—Intense Enthusiasm All Over the Country—Prediction of Greatest Landslide Ever Known TER untold difficulties in secur- ing the right men, Lire now pre- sents its Presidential ticket. The an- nouncement comes in the nick of time. Above all things, we had to have men who could command the contidence of the country even more than the Bull Moose candidate. It was only with the greate: culty that Dr. Frederick Cook, one- time discoverer of the North Pole, could be persuaded to rui “TI have suffered enough,” was ail he would say at first. We then ap- pealed to the Standard Oil Company. the Steel and Tobacco Trust and other well-known philanthropic institutions; and after representing cloquently to them our candidate’s qualifications. succeeded in getting a million to be- gin on. Dr. Cook, with tears in his eyes. then gave his consent. But he made one condition Commodore Peary must run with me,” he said firmly. “We must have one gentleman on the ticket.” “You refer to him?” “Oh, no; to myself.” Commodore Peary, when invited to go on the ticket, at first refused. “Tam awfully fond of Dr. Cook,” he said, “because he did so much to advertise me; and I would do a good deal for him; but I hate to have any- body else get the credit.” We then explained to him about our wonderful campaign contributions, and after looking them over, he also con- sented, “Tf anybody should ask you after- wards where we got the money tell fem,” he said, as filled his suit case with thousand-dollar bills, “ that I refused, with tears in my eyes, to take a red cent; and that, in accept- ing the nomination, I am actuated only by a lofty sense of my country’s wel- ere.” The moment the news went over the wires that Lire’s candidates were in the field the effect was evident. Wall Street responded immediately, and re- ports from all over the country show he that Prosperity is now in the air, Dr. Cook, in his speech of accept- ance, spoke (in part) as follows: “If elected I shall at once re- duce the cost of living everywhere, abolish child labor and the § preme Court, do away with Senate and provide « ladies who h the es for all ve voted for me. 1 will take over all South American Republics, declare war against England and Germany and provide free meal tickets at all the fi lass hotels in New York for every friend of the administra- tion. The people must rule. In case anyone wants anything now is the time to ask for it, and I will put it in the platform. By the I think we'd hetter double the pension list. Every old soldier should ride in a limousine.” also way, Commodore Peary was equally em- phatic. Dlubber industry must be he said, ro" “otherwise, me for free trade.” The news that a new party has been formed, with Messzs. Cook and Peary White House was closely guarded England representatives of Trust.” comicbooks.com